A serious question about god: Spaghetti or Fettucine?
As the world's greatest deity, the Flying Spaghetti Monster is revered by thousands. However, as Pastafarians debate about the true nature of God, I'd like to hereby give my two cents. I actually believe that the Flying Spaghetti Monster should actually be called "Flying Fettuccine Monster".
Firstly, the fettuccine's flat shape is an indication that the Flying Fettuccine Monster (hereafter, FFM) is just, fair and equal. Here's a sample of how merciful fettuccine look minutes prior to its ritual ingestion:
Such kindness is a symbol of how the FFM cares about us. There's no doubt about it. Also, FFM in the Female-Female-Male trinity is the most sacred kind of love there is, as only two females can give the attention (and prepare all the sammiches) a true man needs. Water is made of two hydrogen molecules (hydro comes from the Greek word "hyster" meaning "uterus") and one oxygen molecule (Oxygen was the Greek God of virility). So FFM also symbolises the perfect balance between the sexes. Or something.
So, unlike those raviolic heretics, fettuccinists can be one step closer to the almighty omnipastic God, reason why I just had to preach and bring you fellow coreans one step closer to him.
It's about time we protested against the spaghetti heresy and diffused the true truth. Anyway, I need some sleep and I can't go on, but I want to see some serious worshipping here when I wake up.
___________________
Indiana Clones Upcoming Sets
[ I May Upload Something Someday ]
Last edited by Lira on Nov-09-2007 at 04:29
|
