Hmm the bassline is good. It works.
The hihat loop that is panned to the left has nothing that really completes it on the right. Sounds kinda empty.
Nice melodies. I like the chime melody a lot.
The gated synth doesn't work in my opinion.
Nice break but vary it a bit. Make the kick roll more maybe.
I kinda lost interest in the fifth minute. Add more stuff.

7.5/10
Omer

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yeah...my weakest weakness...arranging...I mean...the melodies I can write are good I think...but overall arrangement sucks...well thanks for your comments...


Anyone has something more to say?

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Hi there,

I definately agree that it's a strong bass...works very well and I can see you're talented as far as composition goes. I think it needs a lot of work though. Sounds like you're trying to go for an epic sound but its not very messive and sounds somewhat dull and repetitive. I think the central melody could do well next to a secondary lead that might add more variance and attention to the main lead.

Speaking of which...while the panned filtered percussion is certainly an interesting effect, it somewhat detracts from the mix. Not sure how to explain, but it's almost sort of pulls me away from listening to the central mix and it starts to sound a little messy. Maybe less swing on them for sure. Not sure what else you can do here.

Another thing I noticed was the break-beat wasn't all that strong. Instead of a weakened breakbeat you might want to go into an all out breakdown and build it back up that way...although this is just my creative opinion.

Definately liked the chime, and the overall sound of the track has a lot to offer. Not ready to release, and certainly needs some polishing but keep at it!!!!! You have a potential good one here.

Cheers and thanks for the production,
Andrew

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As the other guys said, it needs a bit more variation. But hey! I really enjoyed it! Awesome bass and melodies! You should definitey send it to labels - keep working!


Takere!

Akia

Sweet strings in the beginning. But if you made the intro a bit bigger with more instruments/effects it could be awesome. The chime stuff is cool but it gets kind of boring around 3 minutes. I think you need more melodic elements (arps/background sounds) to go for the melodic feeling.

I mean the start is fine, but it looks like you ran out of ideas after a couple minutes. Don't drag it out, try something new.

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some good ideas yes, but the theme was very dragged out. 9min+ is a bit much for this kind of progression, what others said I would take as good advice- get more creative and dynamic by building on your ideas and taking them to new levels.

Thanks all, I think I will give a bit of time to sending demos...

anyway just a few points, someone pointed out that I aimed for an epic sound, which I actually did not...I didn't want a massive stormer...just something sorta ambient with a solid beat and bassline.

I will see if I can do a new one which will have more variation because I think you're all pretty much right about this...thanks

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Strings were amazing man. They were really good samples (I'm a sucker for good string melodies). Sounds like you made this on Reason and used the Subtractor a little too much. You may need a little more arpeggiation on the bass line. Try more variation man!