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A peace plan based on Israel following the United States' lead
You may have noticed that just a couple weeks ago (April 16) a group of disgruntled Iraqi civilians decided to throw rocks at US troops in Iraq. The GI's mowed them down and killed 10 of them. For rock throwing. I mention this because of course the position of the US State Department has long been that when Palestinians throw rocks at Jews it is mere symbolic protest, not violence and certainly not terrorism. Heck, even Edward Said joined the fun and threw rocks at the Jews.
Now I think this event is just the trigger that we need to issue a call to the leaders of Israel to abandon their failed policies and follow in the footsteps of the United States. Israel needs to accept the US role model, since the US is the worlds superpower and a great democracy.
Israels needs to do some Americanized homework, and adopt some American ways. It needs to take some lessons from the great cradle of liberty!
To help things along, we have made a partial list here.
FOLLOWING THE EXAMPLE OF THE AMERICANS:
1. When Arabs throw rocks at Jews, Israeli troops should mow them
down with automatic fire. It does not matter if they are civilians. No rubber bullets.
2. When a country aligns itself with terrorists who are launching
atrocities against civilians, Israel should do to Syria and Lebanon what the US did to Iraq.
3. When the leader of a country behaves belligerently, makes threats,
plots assassinations, aids terrorists, and develops weapons of mass
destruction, Israel should follow the US lead and drop smart bombs with a ton or so of explosives in them on the buildings in which Asad or his family can be shown to be staying.
4. When people complain about collateral damages and civilians
killed in military operations, Israel should follow the American lead and say tough.
5. Since the US today announced it was going to take harsh action
against Iraqis who had looted national antiquities from museums and
elsewhere and would hunt them down and deal with them in uncompromising ways, Israel should follow the US lead by expelling the PLO from the Temple Mount and from the area around Josephs Tomb in Nablus, where the PLO has similarly been systematically destroying antiquities.
6. When suspicious vehicles approach Israeli positions and troops,
Israel should deal with them the same way the US did and does with
suspicious vehicles in Iraq.
7. When terrorists hide in schools or hospitals or religious
institutions, Israel should deal with them the American way.
8. Israel should follow the American lead and bomb Western human
shields to smithereens.
9. When the UN or some snotty European countries support the enemies
of your country, ignore them and publicly display you contempt for them.
10. Israel should follow the American lead and expel all hostile
journalists from war zones and allow in only those who are not seeking to invent propaganda reports to discredit your country. In Israels case, any journalist who refers to terrorists as activists or militants would get deported.
11. Israel should encourage people to smack statues and photos of
Arafat with their sandals.
12. Israel should capture, try for war crimes, and then hang
Palestinians who mistreated Israeli POWs.
13. Israel should rename anything in the country whose name includes
the term French.
14. Israel should make it clear that the civilian needs of the
Palestinians will be addressed only after all the violence stops.
15. Israel will insist that the eastern areas of Syria be converted
into a semi-autonomous Kurdish area. Israel will enforce a no-fly zone within 200 kilometers of the Golan Heights and will shoot down any Syrian object flying in that area.
16. Israel will insist that Syrias oil industry and resources be
seized, used to finance reparations to victims of Syrian aggression, and otherwise to be held in escrow for a future democratic Syrian regime.
17. Dissident expatriates from Syria, and especially emigrant Syrian
Jews living in Israel, will be invited to seize the reins of power in
liberated Syria. Similarly expatriate Jews will be invited back into the liberated areas of Judea, Samaria and Gaza to set up residence and participate in nation building.
This all sounds fair to US ... but why is it so different for YOU?
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Signature Suspended as it was deemed offensive.
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