got this in an email ..guess its only funny if u driven in jersey.

1. Turn signals will give away your next move. A real
New Jersey driver never uses them.

2. Under no circumstances should you leave a safe
distance between you and the car in front of you, or
the space will be filled in by somebody else putting
you in an even more dangerous situation.

3. The faster you drive through a redlight, the
smaller the chance you have of getting hit.

4. Never, ever come to a complete stop at a stop sign.
No one expects it and it will result in you being rear
ended.

5. Never get in the way of an older car that needs
extensive bodywork. New Jersey is a no-fault
insurance state and the other guy doesn't have
anything to lose.

6. Braking is to be done as hard and late as possible
to ensure that your ABS kicks in, giving a nice,
relaxing foot massage as the brake pedal pulsates. For
those of you without ABS, it's a chance to stretch
your legs.

7. Never pass on the left when you can pass on the
right. It's a good way to scare people entering the
highway.

8. Speed limits are arbitrary figures, given only as suggestions and are apparently not enforceable in New Jersey during rush hour.

9. Just because you're in the left lane and have no
room to speed up or move over doesn't mean that a New
Jersey driver flashing his high beams behind you
doesn't think he can go faster in your spot.

10. Always slow down and rubberneck when you see an
accident or even someone changing a tire.

11. Learn to swerve abruptly. New Jersey is the home
of high-speed slalom driving thanks to the State
Highway Department, which puts potholes in key
locations to test drivers' reflexes and keep them on
their toes.

12. It is traditional in New Jersey to honk your horn
at cars that don't move the instant the light changes.

13. Remember that the goal of every New Jersey driver
is to get there first, by whatever means necessary.

14. In the New Jersey area 'flipping someone the bird'
is considered a polite New Jersey salute. This gesture
should always be returned.

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