Jerry Johnston, President and CEO of the Clorox Company (NYSE: CLX) is, according to recent judicial interpretations of the Patriot Act, irrefutably legally considered a "terrorist". Specifically, he is guilty of "manufacturing nuclear or chemical weapons."

Martin Dwayne Miller, a 24-year-old citizen of North Carolina was charged with precisely the same violation. You see, Mr. Miller was guilty of operating a meth lab. And, naturally, since we define a chemical weapon to be "any substance that is designed or has the capability to cause death or serious injury ... or contains toxic or poisonous chemicals or their immediate precursors", we can only conclude that Mr. Miller, for producing methamphetamines - which it cannot be denied "[have] the capability to cause death or serious injury."

It follows, then - if we are to be consistent - that Mr. Johnston must immediately be arrested and charged with the same violation. After all, bleach, quite undeniably, "has the capability to cause death or seroius injury."

Either that, or perhaps we should reconsider our definition of chemical weapons.

That our leaders would even propose, much less enact, a piece of legislation which included the aforementioned definition of chemical weapons is, in my mind, irrefutable proof that our leaders are completely and totally inept - incapable of even exhibiting the slightest semblance of rational thinking. A system under which such imbeciles might be given such authority cannot be considered an effective system of government.

-end rant-

Regards,

Arbiter