I know nobody will mind a few chuckles at the expense of the Clintons...

quote:

Bill Clinton is everywhere now promoting his book. I believe the last time Clinton did a media blitz like this was to deny everything that's in this book. --David Letterman. "Bill Clinton's book went on sale today at long last. Earlier today hundreds of people waited outside of Barnes and Noble in the pouring rain for a chance to meet Bill Clinton. When asked if she minded the rain, One woman said, "I'm meeting Bill Clinton, I just assumed my dress would get ruined" --Conan O'Brien "I just read Bill Clinton's book. Hundreds of affairs, thousands of lies, lawsuits, subpoenas and then I got to page two". --Craig Kilborn Experts say that Bill clinton's book could raise 100 million dollars. Hillary wants to burn it, George Bush wants to color it and John Kerry wants to marry it." --Craig Kilborn "Former President Clinton is everywhere right now. Earlier today Oprah Winfrey asked Bill Clinton if he has talked to Monica Lewinsky since the affair. Clinton responded, "Are you kidding? I didn't talk to her during the affair" --Conan O'Brien A thousand people waited in line for an autographed copy of Bill Clinton's book. There was pushing, there was shoving, there was groping and that's just when Bill signed your book." --Craig Kilborn "Bill Clinton's autobiography came out today. It's based on a true story." --Jay Leno "Bill Clinton was on "Oprah" talking about the book. I guess tomorrow he's on the Maury Povich show doing one of those paternity test shows...In two days he's been on 60 Minutes, He's been on 'Oprah' , tomorrow he's on 'Larry King'. The only thing he hasn't been on lately is Hillary." --Jay Leno "How many of you folks purchased a copy of 'My Life' by Bill Clinton. It was in the book stores yesterday and it was a great day for Bill. The first day he sold 1,500 books and he got 6 phone numbers." --David Letterman "I loved it when Bill Clinton told Dan Rather the worst day of his life was the day he told Hillary the truth. Well of course it was. The first time you try anything it's always going to be difficult." --Jay Leno "Hillary Clinton's 506-page memoirs have come out. So much of her personality shines through, that in the end, you, too, will want to sleep with an intern." -- Craig Kilborn "In Hillary Clinton's new book 'Living History,' Hillary details what it was like meeting Bill Clinton, falling in love with him, getting married, and living a passionate, wonderful life as husband and wife. Then on page two, the trouble starts." -- Jay Leno "In the book she says when Bill told her he was having an affair, she said 'I could hardly breathe, I was gulping for air.' No, I'm sorry, that's what Monica said." -- David Letterman "Hillary Clinton, our junior senator from New York, announced that she has no intentions of ever, ever running for office of the President of the United States. Her husband, Bill Clinton, is bitterly disappointed. He is crushed. There go his dreams of becoming a two-impeachment family." -- David Letterman "Last night, Senator Hillary Clinton hosted her first party in her new home in Washington. People said it was a lot like the parties she used to host at the White House. In fact, even the furniture was the same." -- Jay Leno "Senator Hillary Clinton is attacking President Bush for breaking his campaign promise to cut carbon dioxide emissions, saying a promise made, is a promise broken. And then out of habit, she demanded that Bush spend the night on the couch." -- Craig Kilborn "CNN found that Hillary Clinton is the most admired woman in America. Women admire her because she's strong and successful. Men admire her because she allows her husband to cheat and get away with it." -- Jay Leno "Hillary Clinton is the junior senator from the great state of New York. When they swore her in, she used the Clinton family Bible. You know, the one with only seven commandments." -- David Letterman