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hmmm Metro News didnt give it too good of a review today....
| quote: | ALEXANDER
* (out of five)
It should be hard to explain why Alexander fails as monumentally as it does: The idea is good, the cast is strong, the story pretty much writes itself.
And yet, on the other hand, this three-hour dogpile of embarrassment can be summed up in just two words: "Oliver" and "Stone."
The multiple Oscar winner is quite possibly the last person who should be making a grandiose Hollywood epic about the Macedonian warrior-king who conquered much of the known world before dying just short of his 33rd birthday, three centuries before the birth of Christ.
Stone’s Alexander, like pretty much every movie he’s made since Natural Born Killers, is like a hyperactive three-year-old — it only has one volume setting, it keeps veering off course to follow the next thing that crosses its field of vision (hey, an eagle!), and it lives entirely in the now.
Which is not exactly a positive attribute in a movie about history.
Character and motivation are so simplistic that they’re virtually nonexistent: Stone winds up arguing that Alexander (Colin Farrell) drove his empire further into the world than any other leader before him because ... um, well, his dad (Val Kilmer) was a drunk and a womanizer, and his mom (Angelina Jolie) really hated his dad. And played with snakes. And might have conspired to kill him. And might also have come on to her son.
The Oedipal thing between Farrell and Jolie would be problematic enough if it wasn’t for the ludicrous accent Jolie has been encouraged to adopt — a bad impression of Irene Pappas in Zorba The Greek that wouldn’t stand out as awkwardly if not for the fact the rest of the cast are more or less using their own accents.
But then, Stone has always been prone to encouraging his actors to dive deeply into outsized performances, without providing the proper context for them. Here, he’s created a movie full of ideas for epic scenes, that never quite realizes any of them, pulling away from massive battles (or from Farrell’s deeply uncomfortable love scenes with Rosario Dawson and, sorta-kinda, Jared Leto) so Anthony Hopkins’ narration can tell us what was left on the cutting room floor.
It’s a disaster, and all the swords, arrows and raging elephants in the East can’t make it work for more than 30 seconds at a time. |
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Alexander
I was fukin angry lol, all that hype for nothing. 
