Hahahaha lol...that is hilarious! Ummmmm I peed my pants when I was in kindergarten? That's about it!

quote:

Originally posted by kelly923 so my family went on vacation (i'm living at home for the summer) and i guess someone needed to borrow my suitcase... well i just got home and my fuckin vibrator is sitting on my pillow w/ an extra battery right next to it, because it was in the suitcase pocket...LoL, i'm soo embarrassed! so any other embarrassing stories?

pics or stfu.

hahaha

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quote:

Originally posted by Halcyon+On+On OOKA-OOKA ME NACHOS ME PRESS KEYS ON COMPUTER GOOD

my parents once found like 2 bottles of booz in my car half finished. they gave methis huge speach

but i guess this doesnt compare to wtvr the fuck happend to u

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quote:

Originally posted by Halcyon+On+On OOKA-OOKA ME NACHOS ME PRESS KEYS ON COMPUTER GOOD

I saw a Wellington sign today! I dunno where the hell that is lol

ooo, that's pretty bad, I dont think i can top that.

I've got this though...in grade school i was having a distance peeing contest (boys will be boys u know), and we were missing the target, apparently i had some aiming issues as a kid . we were about 7 feet from the urinals, and we look over and the janitors, (1 woman and 1 man) were watching us the whole time.. kinda creepy. but then they bitched us out hardcore...and for some reason, i felt embarassed about that for like 6 years. talk about guilt trip right?



yeh, that's my embarassing story...

when i was 5yrs old I lived in Dominican Republic.....

...i had bodyguards, maids, chauffuers, the works.

im at my neighbors house, playin and whatever...and then it hit me.

I have to poop!


ok so i bolt home.

holding my ass the whole way.

Now I didnt wear shoes or underwear much back then lol...

so i zip by the front gate, where one of the guards is standing, still holding my ass.

The drive way leading up to the front door was full of gravel and rocks.....so with each step is immense pain cuz im running my little covered-up ass as quickly as I can.

I finally get to the front door, and turn the knob.

AND IT'S LOCKED!!

at that moment, i lost all hope of reaching the toilet on time and I let loose.

I shat all over myself, and the poo was slowly running down my leg. This big chunk, just running down my leg.

All of a sudden I hear the sound of gravel rummaging around as if someone was walking up the drive way.....i flick the shit into this little pile right in front of the door, and hide behind a bush.

The guard turns the corner, walks to the front door, and looks down........and he sees a pile of crap just laying there.

I can only imagine him putting two and two together....little kid zipping by him holding his asshole.....pile of shit in front of door.

now that is fuked up

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^^^



I had a similar instance too, was playin outside, had a big dump lined up, and the door was locked, no one was home. what else can u do besides let loose. fortunately only my mum saw me though, when she came home. and she didnt tell.

edit: btw i was 3 or 4, i've learned to keep it in since then.

I was sitting right next to a girl that I had a crush on in the library when I was in fourth grade. I had just leaned forward to grab a pencil out of the cup at the center of the table and BLAM... I accidentally let loose with what remains to this day my loudest and most impressive fart. Ever. I never even felt it coming.

Worst part is... I shat myself a bit in the process and didn't realize it until my ass was flat on the chair again.

That day sucked.

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1. Utah Saints - Lost Vagueness (Oliver Lieb's Main Mix)
2. Klea - Tic Toc (Paul Van Dyk's Re-Edit)
3. Alibi - Eternity (Inner City Mix)
4. Cirque de Soleil - Pokinoi (Sasha Mix)
5. Chris & Kai vs. Levin - Gone to Heaven

quote:

Originally posted by kelly923 so my family went on vacation (i'm living at home for the summer) and i guess someone needed to borrow my suitcase... well i just got home and my fuckin vibrator is sitting on my pillow w/ an extra battery right next to it, because it was in the suitcase pocket...LoL, i'm soo embarrassed! so any other embarrassing stories?

hah shit that sucks
similar thing happened to my ex-gf, she left hers in her bed i guess and the next day her mom went to wash the sheets...she found it sitting smack in the middle of a perfectly made bed out in the open when she got back

heh also like a few weeks ago we went to the local drive-in, and i borrowed my dad's minivan so we could park backwards, open the back, and with the back seat out lay inside the van and still see fine
worked great, except somehow her birth control pills fell out of her purse and she didn't realize till she was home
she called me the next day when she realized, and i knew they could very well be in that van, which my dad was gonna be driving all day to his vacation for the weekend, then back a day or two later
comes back, comes up to me: 'i think i found something of liz's....its in your room'
walk in, birth control pills smack in the middle of my bed
funnier part though is that she thought her dog ate them, cause her dog's been known to eat anything
so we told people that her dog was on birth control...got a lot of weird looks

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http://www.youtube.com/mezzir

I remember once i went to my friends house and I was about to take piss and the window was open. They had this fixture over the toilet, that had various lotions, soaps and air freshener. Unfortunately for me, my friends mother left her panties on this fixture(It's her house, and the toilet is right by the shower), and it was cold.

Now I pull my dick out, and I'm about to piss, but I want to close the window first. With my dick in my hand, I lean forward to close the window and the panties are RIGHT in front of my face, and she comes in at the same time.

You can guess what happened.

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"If she's old enough to crawl, she's already in position." -- Pedobear

i have one, even though it wasn't my fault all.

The 6th graders were suppose to help out the kindergarders for the day. Well they went out for recess and the little kids I had were crazy. Well he's see my female classmate wearing a skirt... SOOOO he does the smart thing and pulls them down. Of course she's all pissed and asked the wrong question:

"DID HE TELL YOU TO DO THIS?"

You see with that line of questioning it's improper and actually gives you a person to place a blame one. A better question would have been:

"Who told you to do this?"

But no, they point at me and state "Did he tell you to do this" OF course he says yes. Everybody just looks at me with the evil look. I was framed i tell ya... i was framed!