This one is funnier everytime I see it:


"It has been brought to management's attention that some individuals throughout the company have been using foul language during the course of normal conversation with other employees. Due to complaints received from some employees who are more easily offended, this type of language will no longer be tolerated.

Nonetheless, we do realize the critical importance of individuals being able to properly express their feelings when communicating with fellow employees.

Therefore, a list of code phrase replacements has been compiled so proper exchange of ideas and information can continue in an effective manner without risk of offending our more sensitive co-workers. "

[Old phrase]____________________________[Preferred new phrase]
No fucking way! ................... I'm certain that's not feasible.
You've got to be shitting me. ............................... Really?
Tell someone who gives a fuck. ..... Perhaps you should check with...
Ask me if I give a fuck. .................. Of course I am concerned.
It's not my fucking problem .... I wasn't involved with that project.
What the fuck? ......................................... Interesting.
Fuck it, it won't work. ......... I am not sure I can implement this.
Why the fuck didn't you tell me that sooner?
.............................................I'll try to schedule it.
When the fuck do you expect me to do this?
.............................................Perhaps I can work late.
Who the fuck cares? ................ Are you sure this is a problem?
He's got his head up his ass. ... He's not familiar with the problem.
Eat shit! ............................................... Excuse me?
Eat shit and die, mother******. ..................... Excuse me, Sir?
What the fuck do they want from my life?
..........................................They weren't happy with it?
Kiss my ass. ........................ So you'd like my help with it?
Fuck it, I'm on salary. ............... I don't think you understand.
Shove it up your ass. ......................... I love a "challenge".
Who the hell died and made you the boss?
....................................You want me to take care of this.
Blow me. .................................................... I see.
Blow yourself. .......................................... Do you see?
Another fucking meeting? ....... Yes, we really should discuss this.
I really don't give a shit.
..................................I don't think it will be a problem.
He's a fucking prick. ................... He's somewhat insensitive.
She's a ball-breaking bitch. ......... She's an aggressive go-getter.
You don't know what the fuck you're doing.
.................................I think you could use more training.
This place is all fucked up. ........... We're a little disorganized.

HAHAHAHHAHAAHAHAHAHAHAH!!!

...wtf...no-one else found this funny!?!?!?

omg

hehehehe, thanks Alien

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Peace 'n Love! • Mikey • Sydney, Australia.

haha

quote:

This place is all fucked up. ........... We're a little disorganized.

quote:

What the fuck? ......................................... Interesting

those are funny

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OMG this is the funniest thing i've read in a LONG time

good one AlienFactory!!!!

quote:

Originally posted by [A|ienFactory] This one is funnier everytime I see it: Kiss my ass. ........................ So you'd like my help with it? Blow me. .................................................... I see. Blow yourself. .......................................... Do you see?

Hoo hoo...this is sooo funny, hehe, some nice translations =)
Tnx man

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Failed at becoming a god...

lol lol great one alienf.. fuck that..

[A|ienFactory]

thx

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http://www.rustzachtpim.tk/
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Rust Zacht Pim

quote:

Eat shit! ............................................... Excuse me? Eat shit and die, mother******. ..................... Excuse me, Sir?

lol, it's fucking funny.....................it's really funny.

If i had followed this list i could have kept myself out of alot of trouble. Maybe i should print a mini version and carry it around with me or something.

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Tracks of the moment

1. FilterFunk - Message In a Bottle (Sander Van Doom Remix)
"A Hundred Million Cast aways, Looking For A Home"
2. Ferry Corsten - Whatever (Marcel Woods Remix) (again) (original)
3. Bone Thugs n Harmony and all their solo's (seriously..)

funny

Funny!

Hell yeah!

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dawm dude, your list is way longer than the original one I knew

it does gets funnier every time.

lololol