So I get home from work today to find a package sitting on my doorstep. I didn't remember ordering anything, and checking the label revealed the oddly obscure return address of Order Processing Center in New Jersey. Now I don't even like to talk abut Jersey, so wtf could I have ordered from there?

I brought the package inside, curious as to what it could be.


Sine the package was addressed to me, I felt comfortable opening it up...First I took my small pair of scissors and slit the sides...



...then the top of the package.



Inside the package was some bubble wrap which obscured the other contents...a long 9" reflective box and a round object.



Not recognizing the packaging, I did what any mortally curious person would do; i adjusted the bubble wrap to allow me to see the objects. As I did so, a strong strawberry scent hit me, it's pleasant odor horribly conflicting with my realization that someone has sent me a masturbatory phallic object!





Alongside this "thoughtful" gift, I also received 4 fl. oz (118mL) of lubricant, no doubt to assist with the insertion of this object! Its labeling identified it as the scent I had smelled upon my perusal of the packages contents



Further inspection of the packaging revealed this phallacy to be none other than the infamous SILICONE EXPLORER, a 6 inch dildo with 7 vibrating speeds charmingly titled with names such as "Roller Coaster" and "Stair Stepper".



Alongside this delightful features, it also presents its user with other novelties such as a "Flexible head that moves with you", "one touch activation" for those solo quickies, and a "Glow in the dark button!" for those nights under the sheets when your excitement whilst stabbing your rectum repeatedly cause you to lose your grip, sending your masturbatory dildo flying! Add the main material of hygienically superior silicone (easy to clean and store) and you've got one ultimate rectal (or vaginal) stimulation machine.

Not being in the market for a new dildo, i decided to forward this item to my shemale loving friend Dereleek Alon de Peter-Psy-T, who I hope will enjoy it firmly.

At this point, Id like to thank everyone who made this post possible. That includes: Citric Acid, Boomer187, Sand Leaper,
Jackson, venomX, jamie, Renegade, Konjin, Akridrot, YGrene, Halcyon, and the people at #ourboard (thus a few of you get double kudos), the best channel on blitzed I'm awaiting a bit more of this gift and a little bit of love from one of our donators then this package will be off to haifa israel. I cant wait till they open the package at UPS to inspect what im sending

holy crap!

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Official Site - www.sterilis.co.uk

I was going to guess at chlamidia. Ah well

!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!1


awesomest thread ever!!!!111111

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People who own my ass: Citric Acid, Boomer187, Tribu, Sand Leaper,
Jackson, venomX, jamie, Renegade, Konjin, Akridrot, Miss Bliss.
Psy-T - Down The Rabbit Hole (400minute long acid set)

woot! awesomeness

dooes the lube taste like strawberrys?

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quote:

Originally posted by Halcyon+On+On OOKA-OOKA ME NACHOS ME PRESS KEYS ON COMPUTER GOOD

Hooray!!!!!!!!

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"If she's old enough to crawl, she's already in position." -- Pedobear

HAHAHA Who sends someone a Dildo?!?

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Fortuna Favet Fortibus.

+++edit+++

i totally thought it was going to be a bong [ala rjt's big surprise]

Day 8: God created the shemale. Thus there was a need to create the shemale-dildo.

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thanks to everyone again

___________________
People who own my ass: Citric Acid, Boomer187, Tribu, Sand Leaper,
Jackson, venomX, jamie, Renegade, Konjin, Akridrot, Miss Bliss.
Psy-T - Down The Rabbit Hole (400minute long acid set)