It starts off nicely but just when the track starts moving there's a break (at around 2:10) which feel totally uncalled for which totally threw me off. Also, the break is too long and doesn't really build it up for me. Try make the break to really build up some tension instead.

Then it moves on fairly well but at around 6:45 you really lost me as it goes out of beat. This would really kill the dancefloor. The melody that comes in at 7:35 is a bit too loud for me and again lacks a proper build up (again, it's about tension and release). Be careful when messing with the beat. Afterall people are supposed to dance to this, right?

Mixing seem to distort a lot. Distorsion can be useful when put intentionally as an effect but you don't want it whacking your mix. Check your levels and instead throw in a limiter or maximizer on the output to add energy and loudness.

Just keep on working, it's the only way to learn.

Good luck!