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Hi man,
it really is what I expected to hear when I read it was your first song in fruity loops. Crap
Don't take it to lightly, you got the main idea and tiesto's Lord of Trance may not be a good example to show what trance is today.
But aside from that, it sounds exactly like my first songs. The main thing that can really help you take it up a notch is;
- Get VST's
- Invest in up-to-date Sample Packs
- Do some reading about mixing 
You've got what it takes judging by your melodies which are independant of instrument choice, but you can really make them live with the proper synths.
Good luck with it!
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.Deviantart!¯\(º_o)/¯
.TWITTER!¯\(º_o)/¯
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