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What's the worst food in your kitchen?
Even for those of us who like to cook and don't eat too much junk, I think that most people who live alone (and several people who don't) have at least one "desperation food."
It might be frozen dinners, canned pasta, Chunky soup, "Ramen" noodles, Spam (I once actually saw someone take one off the supermarket shelf) - whatever it is, the principle is the same. You know it's crap, you don't even really like it, but you rationalize away the purchase on the grounds that it's just in case of a major culinary emergency, like, say, it's 1 AM, and you've got the munchies, and you forgot to make dinner, and the only leftovers lying around have mold spores large enough that you could toss one on the passenger seat of your car and start driving around in the "carpool" lane.
I got to thinking about this after being re-introduced to Gaffigan's Hot Pockets routine, where he memorably says, "I've never eaten a hot pocket and then afterward been, 'I'm glad I ate that.'" We don't have Hot Pockets here but we do have Pizza Pops / Pizza Pockets which are just as bad, arguably worse, although that's kind of like saying I'd rather receive a wedgie than actually be kicked in the balls.
And I have them in my freezer.
I don't know why I buy them. I'm never actually satisfied after eating one. All I end up with is a deep sense of shame and, later, stomach cramps. But they're there, ever-present, one despicable 4-pack getting replaced by the next every few months.
So I'm curious to hear from the other TOTAs: What foods do you have stashed in the fridge/freezer/cupboard that you wish you weren't going to eat but will anyway? What offenses against nature are you keeping in stock right now?
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My party schedule:
2009-02-21 - DJ Attention @ I'm So Popular
2009-06-18 - DJ Annoying @ People Need To Know Where I'll Be
2012-11-32 - DJ Insufferable ɸ Or At Least the Stalkers I Complain About
2048-06-66 - Spastic & Whocares ¶ Although I'm Actually Flattered
9999-45-81 - Tweaker Gimp ☼ I Probably Won't Even Go To This But I Have To Make Sure I Fill Up All The Available Space Here
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