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Definitely needs work.
Most of the samples and sound choices aren't very good, they're extremely cheesy. I can actually hear the pitch envelope on the kick.
The clap sounds like it should be in a 90's trance track, and the hat is way too tinny for the track.
There's no groove either, it has no swing and it's on the grid exactly. The synthesizer you used for the main hook was again pretty cheesy but could be a decent synth with a little tweaking done to it.
The transition FX you used at 2:02 almost made my ears leak blood, way too much treble. It was like one of those teenager deterrent devices.
The mix is really off too, some of the EQing sounds really wonky, some things are muddy and others are way too tinny.
All you gotta do is keep making tracks though and you'll get better as time goes on. 
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Download my song Survive or I'll cut your ass.
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