You guys might have seen this one before. I got this forward from a friend and it made me pee my pants laughing. Maybe I should have been crying instead, it made me feel so old....


"When I was a kid, adults used to bore me to tears with their tedious
diatribes about how hard things were when they were growing up;
what with walking twenty-five miles to school every morning uphill
both ways through year 'round blizzards carrying their younger
siblings on their backs to their one-room schoolhouse where they
maintained a Straight-A average despite their full-time
after-school job at the local textile mill where they worked for 35
cents an hour just to help keep their family from starving to
death. And I remember promising myself that when I grew up there
was no way in hell I was going to lay a bunch of crap like that on
kids about how hard I had it and how easy they've got it.
But....Now that I've reached the ripe old age o f twenty-nine, I
can't help but look around and notice the youth of today. You've
got it so fuckin' easy. I mean, compared to my childhood, you live
in a goddamned Utopia. And I hate to say it but you kids today, you
don't know how good you've got it. I mean, when I was a kid we
didn't have The Internet-- we wanted to know something, we had to
go to the goddamned library and look it up ourselves. And there was
no email. We had to actually write somebody a letter--with a pen.
And then you had to walk all the way across the street and put it
in the fuckin' mailbox and it would take like a week to get there.
And there were no MP3s or Napsters. You wanted to steal music, you
had to go to the goddamned record store and shop lift it yourself.
Or we had to wait around all day to tape it off the radio and the
DJ'd usually talk over the begining and fuck it all up . We didn't
have fancy shit like Call Waiting. If you were on the phone and
somebody else called they got a busy signal. And we didn't have
fancy Caller ID Boxes either. When the the phone rang, you had no
idea who it was - it could be your boss, your mom, a collections
agent, your drug dealer, you didn't know... You just had to pick it
up and take your chances, mister. And we didn't have any fancy Sony
Playstation videogames with high-resolution 3-D graphics. We had
the Atari 2600. With games like "Space Invaders" and "Asteroids"
and the graphics sucked ass. Your guy was a little square. You had
to use your imagination. And there were no multiple levels or
screens, it was just one screen forever. And you could never win,
the game just kept getting harder and faster until you died. Just
like LIFE. When you went to the movie theatre there was no such thing
as stadium seating. All the seats were the same height. A tall guy
sat in front of you, you were screwed. And sure, we had cable
television, but back then that was only like 20 channels and there
was no onscreen menu. You had to use a little book called a TV
Guide to find out what was on. And there was no Cartoon Network.
You could only get cartoons on Saturday morning...D'ya hear what
the fuck I'm saying?. We had to wait ALL WEEK, you spoiled little
bastards. That's exactly what I'm talking about. You kids today
have got it too easy.
You're spoiled, I swear to God. You guys wouldn't last five
minutes back in 1984!"