press edit :
check the delete post box
and post in the right forum and i'll give my thoughts

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Myspace: http://www.myspace.com/dezmamusic

Sorry... I should have made it clear that the track isn't actually finished yet. As far as I can tell, the Producer's Promotion forum is for completed tracks, is it not?

I don't see the point about posting unfinished tracks at all..
It's a piece of cake to make a 1 minute sample that sounds good, the real skill is to finish off a track. I understand when it is likely to get signed or when you have a particular problem but this doesn't make any sense for me.

ontopic : didn't like it
good for a game of supermario, synths are way too basic, same for bass, drums, ...

ps just because it is unmastered doesn't mean you should record at a decent level. Try recording just under 0db and do a normalise after that, that avoids we have to increase the volume like a had to do here.

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Myspace: http://www.myspace.com/dezmamusic

quote:

Originally posted by DeZmA I don't see the point about posting unfinished tracks at all.. It's a piece of cake to make a 1 minute sample that sounds good, the real skill is to finish off a track. I understand when it is likely to get signed or when you have a particular problem but this doesn't make any sense for me.

Well, for one, it's not a one-minute sample. It's the entire track. And I asked for help because I'm stuck. I know it needs more, but I can't figure out what.

quote:

ontopic : didn't like it good for a game of supermario, synths are way too basic, same for bass, drums, ...

Okay. How would you improve the synths, bass, drums? This is the kind fo help I'm looking for here

quote:

ps just because it is unmastered doesn't mean you should record at a decent level. Try recording just under 0db and do a normalise after that, that avoids we have to increase the volume like a had to do here.

Actually, it is recorded at just under 0dB. I need to do some serious messing around with levels.

cut EVERYTHING at least above 17000khz, my ears are being ripped into pieces by some high frequency from the bellish sound

apart from that, rework all the sounds used and work more on the arrangement...the perussionpart is way to static

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quote:

Originally posted by davedresden i suggest getting the gabriel & dresden prog-a-minute. in 3 easy steps you too could change the face of dance music. batteries not included. - dave

I tried a simple normalise and it got your signal more then 4db louder so you definately didn't record just under 0db

okay here we go
-kick? what kick?, needs compression, eq, ow heck with it, the beat is just shite, take another one
-needs a lot of mixing, drums need to be louder, and there's more in a drumline than a kick and a hi-hat
-buildup way too slow
-I find that high sound to be rather annoying and way too happy (that's what gives me the gameboy-feeling, but well this may be subjective so you might ignore this)
-the main lead simply has not any power, needs more efx, eq and more power in general maybe try creating with another synth
-the climax didn't work for me, that bass-sound is absurd
-then another 3 minutes, nothing happens, nothing happens, nothing happens

I did try to search for something positive, here it is :
the off-beat snareroll is okay

Sorry, this might sound pretty harsh but it's only my opinion, others might like it.

___________________
www.dezma.be

Myspace: http://www.myspace.com/dezmamusic

quote:

Originally posted by Vizay cut EVERYTHING at least above 17000khz, my ears are being ripped into pieces by some high frequency from the bellish sound apart from that, rework all the sounds used and work more on the arrangement...the perussionpart is way to static

Righto... that must have been something I didn't notice in my headphones. They're shite, so I'm hardly surprised.

Thanks

never use headphones...if you can use any descent speakers instead...the bass tends to fuck up completly in headphones

if you have the money a pair of studiomonitors for around 300$ will do the trick

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quote:

Originally posted by davedresden i suggest getting the gabriel & dresden prog-a-minute. in 3 easy steps you too could change the face of dance music. batteries not included. - dave

I have about zero dollars available for anything not completely essential at the moment. Speakers are on my list for sometime in about 6 months. Sad but true.

well I guess we've all been there
it's a pain that studiogear costs so much money

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quote:

Originally posted by davedresden i suggest getting the gabriel & dresden prog-a-minute. in 3 easy steps you too could change the face of dance music. batteries not included. - dave

Cut the Highs, make your pads more airy and add some atonal noise....that will give you the epic feel it looks like you were going for.
And use more effects! You need reverb just about everywhere and add some delay too.......and use a new kick and snare the patterns are ok IMO
and the way the bass comes in at 6:32 just made me choke....j/k....but really...you gota change that.
Fill the sonic spectrum with some more sounds.....thats the key.