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Affirmative Action for the 21st Century
It's been a while since I posted in here, but I just had a remarkable thought that I felt needed to be shared with all of you. This may not be applicable outside of the USA, since I don't really know the numbers outside of North America, and Canada is a lost cause anyway. But without further ado here we go:
It's getting to the point where we've exhausted all minority groups for affirmative action - I mean we've already got our quotas of blacks, hispanics, homeless, natives, women, Asians, gays, handicapped, midgets, porn stars, teletubbies and ex-spice-girls and really seem to be running out of oppressed minorities to show favouritism to. But it seems that all you bleeding-hearts have missed out on one very important minority group!
Are you ready for this?
Political Conservatives!
It should make perfect sense when you think about it. I mean, liberalism is mainstream, right? No intelligent person could possibly be against feminism, affirmative action, gay rights, pro-choice, stricter gun control, religious freedom and social programs, right? Liberalism has in fact become so mainstream that we don't even need to call it liberalism anymore, just moderate!
So what I'm thinking is, how is this fair to all those gun-slinging, gay-bashing, bible-thumping right-wing nuts from Idaho and Texas? Don't they deserve a fair shake at all the best that life has to offer? I mean honestly, I can't seem to find any of these right-wing nuts anywhere in the workplace, aside from maybe Charlton Heston and a handful of popular Reverends. It just has to be some kind of massive conspiratorial discrimination!
Where are the stone-age dry-humping cavemen in NOW? Where are the motor-mouthed bible belters at Hustler Magazine and Vivid Productions? Where are the lifetime NRA members at PETA? Where are the Hank Hills and Boomhauers at CBS and ABC? Tell me people, how can we stand by and watch this great travesty of equal rights pass us by? Where is the equal representation, where is the fairness!?
For heaven's sake, we treat these people like they don't exist! It's not fair I tell you. These people are just like you and me! Why, I think I saw a Political Conservative walking down the street the other day who said he was from Jews for Jeebus or something like that. I didn't really have a lot of time to spend chatting because I was on my way to work, but this man looked completely normal to me and yet seemed to have no real job! And I met a Political Conservative woman last week who told me that she can't afford to send her 43 children (of course she opposes birth control!) to college, and the government won't help her out at all! Well how do you feel about that!? These Political Conservative children are being denied quality education simply because of their Political Conservative background! It's unjust I tell you!
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Actually, on a more serious note and more to the point, I'm pointing my finger squarely (but of course not solely) at television and the news media. Now obviously CNN and Fox News aren't the examples you want to be looking at here, but even taking those propaganda factories into account, does anybody happen to remember the very famous Roper Center study that published a massive survey of cross-country journalists and found that:
- 89% voted for Bill Clinton
- 7% voted for George Bush
- 50% identify themselves as democrats but only 4% as republicans
- 55% described themselves as liberal (compared to 23% of the public)
- 82% are pro-choice (compared to 49% of the population)
- 25% favoured prayer in public schools (compared to 74% of the population)
- 81% favoured affirmative action (compared to 56% of the population)
- 47% were for the death penalty (compared to 74% of the population)
- 78% were for stricter gun control (compared to 50% of the population)
That's just a small selection of what they discovered of course. But now - and I'm being serious here - isn't the whole point of affirmative action supposed to be equitable representation of the population? No wonder the American people watch CNN and listen to Rush Limbaugh on talk radio - watching liberal journalists give them the news is a constant headache!
If we're using affirmative action to represent the way a country looks, shouldn't we also be using it to represent the way a country thinks? Personally, I think that as long as *at least* 50% of the country is not liberal-minded, and as long as we're on the affirmative action boat, we might as well use it where it can actually do some good before the ship sails. Most people in the U.S. believe that the news media is biased to the left (which several surveys such as the one above indicate is true), and the Canadian news media make the U.S. news media look like the state of Alabama on the political scale.
So let's hear it - as long as these news networks have quotas in place for every single other minority, how about addressing the elephant in the living room, the one deficiency that's been around since the 1980s and they're still pretending not to notice - the lack of conservatives in almost every newsroom in every North American country?
Let's see some affirmative action, people!
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My party schedule:
2009-02-21 - DJ Attention @ I'm So Popular
2009-06-18 - DJ Annoying @ People Need To Know Where I'll Be
2012-11-32 - DJ Insufferable ɸ Or At Least the Stalkers I Complain About
2048-06-66 - Spastic & Whocares ¶ Although I'm Actually Flattered
9999-45-81 - Tweaker Gimp ☼ I Probably Won't Even Go To This But I Have To Make Sure I Fill Up All The Available Space Here
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