|
CVS is hilarious.
What with Easter and Passover descending upon us (oxymoron welcome), they've taken it in their hands, as always, to cater to all of us. I find this a bit odd, though. To be honest, most people don't even know what happened on either Passover OR Easter. So who cares, right? More wallet-emptying purchases will be made to fit the mold.
The goods (not purchased. NEVER purchased. im super cereal):
Alright. So we've initially established that there were ten plagues. For some reason, I don't remember any "masks" in the story (PS: STFU. The Egyptian masks don't count.). Why the masks? What the hell is wrong with the people who decided to produce these? I can't even imagine how the kid wearing the "Death of all First Borns" mask must feel. ESPECIALLY if he happens to be one. Eesh. Actually... that particular mask kinda makes the wearer look like Dracula. Odd. I don't remember any vampires in the history books. Hell, if vampires really were a result of that last plague, the story would be THAT much more hardcore.
Well shit. This makes me feel like G-d Himself (Herself/Itself... Your pick, anal ones). A bag of plagues. How freaking badass is that? It'd be a whole lot cooler if they actually worked but... well... the product's selling for somewhere shy of a $10 bill. Can't expect everything.
My favorite one of the bunch here is the COOL shades they got to cover the "Darkness" plague (Number 9 if you're keeping count. Number 10 happened to be covered by the mask the luckiest kid should be wearing, as mentioned above). Curious to know how the blind community feels about that one.
Huh? Oh. Wait. OH! I GET IT! Uh. Well. I guess it is what it is. I'm not sure who'd want this aside from a Hasidic Jewish child. The dilemma with that is, the parents would probably be too cheap to purchase it for him. Hence there being NO purpose of marketing this thing.
Thank you, CVS, for an amusing night.
|
