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Movie Review: Rob Zombie's Halloween
So I guess you can say I was one of the unlucky people who went and saw this garbage. I just have to say one thing: Rob, pls stick to making music as you don't know how to make movies. And it shows, boy does it ever. This film ranks as the worst remake in years.
Warning: Contains minor spoilers.
The problem with the film is that it tries way too hard. Every goddamn person in the movie needs to have some sort of background story, I bet if he had the opportunity he'd write one for the damn janitor too (oh wait, he already did). It just doesn't work because the characters' background stories are utter useless and garbage. Making Michael's parents trailer park trash was just stupid. Making his mom a stripper was even a stupider idea. Like honestly, everybody needs to be fleshed out for some dumb reason which makes the first half of the movie very boring. And whats with the dumb looking orange mask?
The other thing that hurts the movie is its presentation. Nudity? check. Violence? check. Screwing? check. Swearing? check. Uninspired cliches? Check. The list goes on and on. Infact, the first half of the movie feels like a set up for the Devils Rejects. There is no originality here. The original wasn't violent, it was moody and had tension. Rob threw all of that out and instead threw in as much violence and nudity as he could where ever possible. And the dialog is soooo bad at points you're sitting there in disbelief. The only redeeming factor was Malcolm McDowell as Loomis. If he wasn't in there this film would just be completely unwatchable. By the way, calling someone a C@nt does not make you a bad ass. Bad acting, bad script, bad casting, bad directing, JUST PLAIN BAD OVER ALL. Oh and wait till you see the ending, you'll be wanting to stab yourself a couple of times after how bad it bombs. Towards the end the movie is so predictable you just want to pop in the original and watch that. Hell, I'll even pay $13 to watch the original again.
I mean the faults continue. Making Michael talk was a bad idea. Having all of the female characters acting as skanks and swearing every chance they get even worse. Dr. Loomis's cheap 70's hair, Sherri Moon thinking she can act, young Michael wearing that damn stupid mask for the first half of the film, and nearly almost an hour before Michael escapes the prison and comes back. I could go on, but there's no point. I give this film 1 out of 5, the only 2 reasons being 1) that the mask was identical to the original, and 2) at some point the movie did finally finish. Save your money people it aint worth it.
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Last edited by TheDemon on Sep-02-2007 at 05:15
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