Well,

I've just had the most awesome dream with zombies ever:

• I was watching a F-1 race, and a French driver died when a brick hit his helmet;
  
• He became a zombie for some reason;
  
• He started to attack random people around me;
  
• I was holding a ginsu knife, and managed to escape;
  

Now, after this logical and realistic sequence of events, here's the scenario: I was in a city full of zombies, and I'd behead them in their sleep because I thought it was be the best way of killing them. I had some doubts about it, and I woke up because of what happened in the question #3, so I decided to ask the CORe for help now that I'm awake:

1. Is beheading zombies really an effective way of killing them? Was there a better moment to kill them, for that matter?
   
2. Is beheading a zombie with a ginsu knife really as complicated as it seems? A girl woke up the whole family as I tried to kill her, and the infomercial never said anything about zombies...
   
3. Is it really dangerous to have anal sex with a hot female zombie? I reckon she's got no use for her digestive system any more, but I don't know whether her sphincter can turn her into a "Lorena Bobbit" kind of zombie... so I panicked and woke up.
   

I'm sleepy and I want to go back to bed. I don't want to be eaten by zombies in my next dream, and Resident Evil never taught me any of this... could you guys help me?

Thanks in advance

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Last edited by Lira on Dec-15-2007 at 15:29

1. Is beheading zombies really an effective way of killing them? Was there a better moment to kill them, for that matter?
   
   Yes, but not efficient; use a shotgun. And any time you kill a zombie is the right time.
   
   
2. Is beheading a zombie with a ginsu knife really as complicated as it seems? A girl woke up the whole family as I tried to kill her, and the infomercial never said anything about zombies...
   
   Yes, it is complicated. Unless you have a Ginsu sword, beheading them is very messy and time consuming. Does Ginsu make a shotgun?
   
   
3. Is it really dangerous to have anal sex with a hot female zombie? I reckon she's got no use for her digestive system any more, but I don't know whether her sphincter can turn her into a "Lorena Bobbit" kind of zombie... so I panicked and woke up.
   
   
   
   
   
   

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http://www.randomhouse.com/crown/worldwarz/

The audiobook is supposedly the best ever with guest celebrities(Mark Hammill from Star Wars) and a wonderful soundtrack.

In fact, I should probably listen to it, right now.

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Paul Van Dyk 09-24-2009: No, but I can sign your sleeve under that name if you let me!

hmm... sounds interesting, I'll check it out, SV

quote:

Originally posted by Ygrene Is beheading zombies really an effective way of killing them? Was there a better moment to kill them, for that matter? Yes, but not efficient; use a shotgun. And any time you kill a zombie is the right time. Is beheading a zombie with a ginsu knife really as complicated as it seems? A girl woke up the whole family as I tried to kill her, and the infomercial never said anything about zombies... Yes, it is complicated. Unless you have a Ginsu sword, beheading them is very messy and time consuming. Does Ginsu make a shotgun? Is it really dangerous to have anal sex with a hot female zombie? I reckon she's got no use for her digestive system any more, but I don't know whether her sphincter can turn her into a "Lorena Bobbit" kind of zombie... so I panicked and woke up.

She was 18, I swear!

Anyway, wouldn't the zombies ressurect if I shot them unless I blew their hea... oh, go it!

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It's your minds way of telling you that you're fucked in the head, which clearly you are. Weirdo.

quote:

Originally posted by DJ Mikey Mike It's your minds way of telling you that you're fucked in the head, which clearly you are. Weirdo.

Can we please refrain from stating the obvious, Captain?

Besides, dreams are supposed to be messed up. If your dreams are "normal", you're really the most boring person I've never met

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quote:

Originally posted by Ygrene Is beheading zombies really an effective way of killing them? Was there a better moment to kill them, for that matter? Yes, but not efficient; use a shotgun. And any time you kill a zombie is the right time. Is beheading a zombie with a ginsu knife really as complicated as it seems? A girl woke up the whole family as I tried to kill her, and the infomercial never said anything about zombies... Yes, it is complicated. Unless you have a Ginsu sword, beheading them is very messy and time consuming. Does Ginsu make a shotgun? Is it really dangerous to have anal sex with a hot female zombie? I reckon she's got no use for her digestive system any more, but I don't know whether her sphincter can turn her into a "Lorena Bobbit" kind of zombie... so I panicked and woke up.

Pretty much. Although I do have a response to number 3.

As long as you were to bound her hands/mouth then I'd imagine it's perfectly safe for you to have anal sex. The mouth is really the only dangerous part really. Although, if the anal sex was pretty rough, it would probably tear the skin in her ass and cause it to bleed....and if you were to do it raw her blood on your dick would probably give you the zombie disease. So wear a condom.

Wear a condom or become a zombie, makes sense to me.

quote:

Originally posted by Lira Can we please refrain from stating the obvious, Captain? Besides, dreams are supposed to be messed up. If your dreams are "normal", you're really the most boring person I've never met

Taking a zombie up the shitter is a bit extreme don't you think? You're a prized weapon.

quote:

Originally posted by DJ Mikey Mike Taking a zombie up the shitter is a bit extreme don't you think? You're a prized weapon.

Well, she looked human enough to me. I mean, she was a zombie just in the inside, but she looked normal and stuff, as she wasn't green or bleeding or anything... it wasn't really as gross as it might sound...

... I guess the really disturbing part would be to bang her yelling "yes, yes, yes" and hear her moaning and saying "brains" as a reply

quote:

Originally posted by bas Pretty much. Although I do have a response to number 3. As long as you were to bound her hands/mouth then I'd imagine it's perfectly safe for you to have anal sex. The mouth is really the only dangerous part really. Although, if the anal sex was pretty rough, it would probably tear the skin in her ass and cause it to bleed....and if you were to do it raw her blood on your dick would probably give you the zombie disease. So wear a condom. Wear a condom or become a zombie, makes sense to me.

Yeah, I like your way of thinking. Next time I fall asleep, I'm going to look for a shotgun and a packet of condoms.

Thanks for that

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how would you be in the position to bang a zombie chick? they don't have a sexual drive. Even if you strap them down, they will tear apart their own limbs in an attempt to feast.

___________________
Everything is beautiful. Let the music carry you. Baby I will follow you forever. Nowhere else I'd rather be when you're lying next to me. Let the music carry us together.
anti-JennyPie Alliance
SuspicionVandit: Are you God?
Paul Van Dyk 09-24-2009: No, but I can sign your sleeve under that name if you let me!

quote:

Originally posted by SuspicionVandit how would you be in the position to bang a zombie chick? they don't have a sexual drive. Even if you strap them down, they will tear apart their own limbs in an attempt to feast.

I don't know. It just seemed right at the time, but I'm starting to forget all the details already.

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this dream is fail because zombies don't sleep.