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The Lift and Tuck method
COR Version:
So im at work the other day when I start to get this random inappropriate boner. It was visually obvious and I couldnt hide it by conventional means. So I went with the classic lift and tuck method where you use your belt/waistline to hold it in a concealed state till it goes away. Dont you hate that shit?
Long Version:
So there I am at work yesterday, finishing up the first phase of project when it happened. An inappropriate and totally random erection began to creep its way up the side of my thigh. I glanced around and hoped it would go away. I thought of aliens moving refigerators up a flight of steps but this only made things tantalizingly worse. Surely the frigid embrace of the computer screen would distract whatever biological mechanism was increasing my genitalic bloodflow. Yet still the boner begin to climb it's way up the denim confines of my jeans and into a range where it's position would be horribly visible.
Any guy whos had this happen knows that at a certain point, you must flex your kegel which will change the hardening penis' trajectory to a safe and hidden location. The time approached ansd I preformed the deed but to no avail, my timing was a split second off and I was stuck in the no man's land of totally obvious and an inch away from concealment.
After quickly assessing the situation, I decided to attempt the daring lift & tuck maneuver in which the preformers hand is used to lift the penis into a state paralell to the body and held in place by the belt or waistline. The rammifications? Well, I work in a place with no cubicles so everything is out in the open. Any of my co-workers preforming a peripheal or sideways glance would almost immediately know what I was doing and no explanation could save me from ridicule for days on end.
I casually glanced to my left and right while sliding my hand to my waist line. I shifted uncomfrotably in my chair, pushing the waistline of my pants down and sceuring my hand between a fold in my shirt. I pivoted my hips back like i was stretching, sliding my hand over the skin and made a grab for the member but it slipped! It was now lodged a little deeper and i had to resort to the dreaded 'underhand scoop-out' method where you are basically wrist deep in your waistline. However I achieved success and was able to conceal the physical oddity.
I used to get these things all the time in high school but the numbers have gone down a bit as ive gotten older. Still theyre such a pain when they're blatantly obviousand you cant stand up or anything.
Last edited by on Dec-23-2006 at 18:16
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