Dear Nou,

I recently had my iPhone hacked and, needless to say, there were some pictures of my scantily clad 14-year-old body, I had sent to my then boyfriend, posted on the internet. They were obtained by a hacker from the Ukraine and now I have a lot of guys calling me who I don't even know and everyone looks at me funny, at school. Can I sue for copyright infringement?

SexyBaitHawt14



Dear Nou,

I want to start my own business as a Japanese translator. I don't know Japanese and I have no intention of learning it, in school. I am just going to learn from Japanese for Dummies and wing the rest of it. That's taking a little longer than I thought and money is running dry. How do I convince my mom and dad to be "investors" in my "business" so I can continue living a life I've become accustomed to, having already defaulted on my student loans?

WayneChun2Nite



Dear Nou,

A couple of my friends are very religious and I want to impose my atheistic views on them. I'm not trying to be a bitch but I just don't like their religious point of view and every time I go over to their house they have like crosses and shit up and I hate it. What's the quickest way I can possibly alienate them while making myself out to be a completely hateful ****?

MaudeWithoutGod

___________________

Now with extra singles!
my old stuff, not quite up to snuff - but I still dig it - UPDATED 9/23/2012