*why does a blonde open juice in the store? because it says "open here"

*how to entertain a blonde for the whole evening? write "turn upside down" on both sides of a sheet of paper

*how to make a blonde laugh on monday evening? tell her a joke on friday morning

*how is the blonde, who painted her hair in black, called? artificial intelligence

*a blonde comes to take a driver's license test. the instructor asks her a theoretical question:
- how does an engine work?
- may i explain in my own words?, - she says.
- of course...
- "vroom, vroooom"

*why do blondes get burried in triangle caskets? whenever they lie on the back, their legs are spreading.

*why do blondes never go to church? whenever they stand on their knees, their mouth opens.

*how many blondes does it take to change a lamp bulb? 25: 24 will die of electric shock, and 25th will be a painted brunette

*how do you make blonde's eyes shine? you put a flashlight to her ear.

*two blondes on the airplane come to a flight attendant:
- will i get to chicago on this plane? - first asks
- no
- and i?

*how is a blonde with two brain cells called? pregnant

*how is a blonde with three brain cells called? gifted

*how is a blonde in a university called? visitor

*why can't a blonde make ice cubes in her fridge? she lost the recipe

*why do men like to drive their with blondes? so that they could park at handicapped parking spaces

*top things blondes invented:
- glossary for vocabulary
- sun battery-operated flashlight
- waterproof teabags
- parachute, automatically opened after a hit
- wheelchair with steering pedals
- airbags for plane pilots
- emergency ejecting seats for helicopters

*what's the smartest cell in blonde's body? spermatozoid

*what's blonde's interpretation of safe sex? sex in the car with a closed door

*what's common between a blonde and a moskito? they stop sucking only if you tap on their head.

*blonde calls computer company technical support...
-i have problems with my computer
-what's on the monitor?
-vase
-i mean, what's written?
-ah... Sony

*what's common between gallileo comet and a smart blonde? both occur once in 75 years

and now to makeup for the blondes:

*who creates all those stupid jokes about blondes? brunettes... during lonely winter evenings

___________________
writing lyrics aint what it used to be