CD Album you wish you never bought
Ok, so here I am last night at 11:30 completely mashed on several long island ice teas and wondering past Tower Records. I stagger through the isles listening for something that would be nice on my [censored - to keep sensitive minds on the topic] home. All of the sudden it hits me, in the dance section: "Cold...."-something... My mind right away reads "Coldplay - a journey of a DJ" So, I happily strut to the register with a CD that I can swear is remixes of Coldplay songs. Wow, mellow, nice and remixed coldplay comming up in 20 mins... whadayaknow??? I pop the cd and start [censored - to keep sensitive minds on the topic] home. about 10 mins into the cd I have this bad nagging feeling creep up on me "This sounds nothing like Coldplay!"... I go through tracks and now my nagging feeling is full-blown panic. I realize that this shite is nothing that I expected. So, I barely make it to the nearest Tower and try to beg the lowly register clerk to take this shit back and let me get something by the village people, or gloria gaynor, or even celline dion - anything but this useless platter of horrible cacophony and musical mayhem.
Well... with Einsteinian "Dude, like, I realize you bought this CD 20 minutes ago but, like, we don't exchange CD's - only for the same thing, sorry dude" - the clerk stands his ground and defends his minimum wage position. So I ask for a manager. A long-haired white trash of a freak with scroungy goatee who could easily pass for a flunkie or a junkie makes his descend. After listening to my begging for mercy to take this awful punishment of a CD back and let me pick anything, even britney spears, all he can spit-bark through his semen stained patch of facial hair is "You gotta take it back to the store you bought it from." "But will they take it back?" I plead still hoping "No" - responds the walking and talking excrement statue. "So, why should I bother?" - "You probably shouldn't" says the scrawny peon, obviously proud of his little power trip and probably getting a renewed flow of blood into his pewny little joke of a penis from such a display of his true might and power. "Customer abused, copyright protected, my corporate masters served and pleased - this day was not a waste" - I bet he's thinking on his way back to whichever ring of inferno he's from, leaving me pondering "Why the fuck would he send me back to the store, knowing they won't take the CD back anyway?" - oh well, time will tell.
Anyway, morals of this story:
1. Never buy any CDs drunk
2. Never buy anything from Tower again (apparently they are big employer of "special" people)
3. Read the fucking CD label completely, I expected Coldplay but bought COLDCUT!!! fucking COLDCUT!!!!!!!!!!!!aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaghhhhh
BTW, I also bought Tiesto "In my memory" - which I thought was also horrible but for some reason it struck a note with me today. I may keep it afterall... As far as Coldcut goes - my neice has been "gifted" with it, she's more tollerant of gut-wrenching noise than I am.
So, on that note: Which CDs do you presently own (recently bought) that you wish you hadn't???
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Proud member of the "Filthy Zionist" coalition
Last edited by CynepMeH on Mar-04-2003 at 22:35
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