POST WHOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOORRRRRRREEESS

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Peace 'n Love! • Mikey • Sydney, Australia.

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quote:

Originally posted by Philby so which ones work on you?

ok all time fav
Hi can i have ur name
Why?
Coz i need a name to a face when i Masturbate

quote:

Originally posted by InAcoma ok all time fav Hi can i have ur name Why? Coz i need a name to a face when i Masturbate

Phillip Bourne

i'll post a pic of my face later

lol

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new set online, Summer Journeys

quote:

Originally posted by InAcoma ok all time fav Hi can i have ur name Why? Coz i need a name to a face when i Masturbate

the one in ur av will do fine thanks

quote:

Originally posted by Philby Phillip Bourne i'll post a pic of my face later lol

alrite

if u wanna pic of me, either check the ta fotopage, or imagine a nice fat ass, looks about like me

how bout some more useless facts ?

Mario, of Super Mario Bros. fame, appeared in the 1981 arcade game, Donkey Kong. His original name was Jumpman, but was changed to Mario to honor the Nintendo of America's landlord, Mario Segali

In the movie "Toy Story", the carpet designs in Sid's hallway is the same as the carpet designs in "The Shining."

Theaters in Glendale, California can show horror films only on Monday, Tuesday, or Wednesday.

You can't plow a cotton field with an elephant in North Carolina.

In Lehigh, Nebraska it's against the law to sell donut holes.

Under the law of Mississippi, there’s no such thing as a female Peeping Tom.

Anti-modem laws restrict Internet access in the country of Burma. Illegal possession of a modem can lead to a prison term.

Lawn darts are illegal in Canada.

In Idaho a citizen is forbidden by law to give another citizen a box of candy that weighs more than 50 pounds.

Every citizen of Kentucky is required by law to take a bath at least once a year.

It is against the law to whale hunt in Oklahoma. (Think about it...)

A Venetian law decrees that all gondolas must be painted black. The only exceptions are gondolas belonging to high public officials.

In the state of Queensland, Australia, it is still constitutional law that all pubs (hotel/bar) must have a railing outside for patrons to tie up their horse.

According to law, no store is allowed to sell a toothbrush on the Sabbath in Providence, Rhode Island. Yet these same stores are allowed to sell toothpaste and mouthwash on Sundays.

Before the enactment of the 1978 law that made it mandatory for dog owners in New York City to clean up after their pets, approximately 40 million pounds of dog excrement were deposited on the streets every year.

Chewing gum is outlawed in Singapore because it is a means of "tainting an environment free of dirt."

The handkerchief had been used by the Romans, who ordinarily wore two handkerchiefs: one on the left wrist and one tucked in at the waist or around the neck. In the fifteenth century, the handkerchief was for a time allowed only to the nobility; special laws were made to enforce this. The classical heritage was rediscovered during the Renaissance.

For hundreds of years, the Chinese zealously guarded the secret of sericulture; imperial law decreed death by torture to those who disclosed how to make silk.

An old law in Bellingham, Washington, made it illegal for a woman to take more than 3 steps backwards while dancing.

By law, information collected in a U.S. census must remain confidential for 72 years.

Candy made from pieces of barrel cactus was outlawed in the U.S. in 1952 to protect the species.

A slander case in Thailand was once settled by a witness who said nothing at all. According to the memoirs of Justice Gerald Sparrow, a 20th century British barrister who served as a judge in Bangkok, the case involved two rival Chinese merchants. Pu Lin and Swee Ho. Pu Lin had stated sneeringly at a party that Swee Ho's new wife, Li Bua, was merely a decoration to show how rich her husband was. Swee Ho, he said, could no longer "please the ladies." Swee Ho sued for slander, claiming Li Bua was his wife in every sense - and he won his case, along with substantial damages, without a word of evidence being taken. Swee Ho's lawyer simply put the blushing bride in the witness box. She had decorative, gold-painted fingernails, to be sure, but she was also quite obviously pregnant.

In Breton, Alabama, there is a law on the town's books against riding down the street in a motorboat.

Connecticut and Rhode Island never ratified the 18th Amendment: Prohibition.

A few years back, a Chinese soap hit it big with consumers in Asia. It was claimed in ads that users would lose weight with Seaweed Defat Scented Soap simply by washing with it. The soap was sold in violation to the Japanese Pharmaceutical Affairs Law and was banned. Reportedly, the craze for the soap was so great that Japanese tourists from China and Hong Kong brought back large quantities. The product was also in violation of customs regulations. In June and July 1999 alone, over 10,000 bars were seized.

In most American states, a wedding ring is exempt by law from inclusion among the assets in a bankruptcy estate. This means that a wedding ring cannot be seized by creditors, no matter how much the bankrupt person owes.

In New York State, it is still illegal to shoot a rabbit from a moving trolley car.

Vermont, Alaska, Hawaii, and Maine are the four states in the U.S. that do not allow billboards.

Wetaskiwin, Alberta from 1917: "It's against the law to tie a male horse next to a female horse on Main Street."

Women were banned by royal decree from using hotel swimming pools in Jidda, Saudi Arabia, in 1979.

In Riverside, California, there is an old law on the city's books which makes it illegal to kiss unless both people wipe their lips with rose water.

In Saudi Arabia, a woman reportedly may divorce her husband if he does not keep her supplied with coffee.

At Disneyland they have hundreds of wild domesticated cats running around the park. They never come out during the day because there's too many people, but the reason they're there is to catch the mice.

Despite the fact that 77 percent of Americans go to the grocery store with a list, it's estimated that half of everything bought there is bought on impulse. Supermarkets report very strong sales of almost anything they stock at the check-out line.

what this place needs is some quality journalism..
extract from exile.ru ..

IMPUDENT & IMPOTENT

Hop aboard the Death Porn train, folks, cuz we’re a-gonna take you deep, deep into f’milyer Death Porn territory. That’s right, we’re headin’ into podmoskoviya, the Serengeti of stupid, vicious and violent crime, where herds of victims spend their days locked in dilapidated 5 story paneli apartment blocks stalked by the lonely, deranged and misunderstood Death Porn predator.

Take “Sergei” (as he was named in a report from last week’s Moskovskii Komsomolets). About ten or so years ago, back in the heady days of shock therapy (ah, what fun those days were for Westerners!), Sergei, then still a teenager, fearfully arranged his first whore trick. However, things didn’t turn out as his fuzzy little loins had hoped. When he got naked with the whore and it came time to do the nasty, he couldn’t pop a chubby. He was just a flaccid john. Even worse, the whore laughed at him and demeaned him, something that Sergei never forgot. Don’t whores ever understand that by laughing at a flaccid man, they’re basically begging him to murder?


“Every robber baron’s gotta start somewhere!”
This confidence-shattering setback didn’t prevent Sergei from doing the normal podmoskoviya thing of getting married to a local and having a daughter. That led to another common phenomenon in Russia: once his wife squatted out the daughter, Sergei became a speck of dust in her eyes. That meant no more attention, no more respect, and most of all, no more skull shines.

So Sergei came up with a great idea. On October 29, 2001, he called a whore ad in the newspaper (like our page 23!), met her at an appointed place and went back to her apartment on Ulitsa Kastaevskaya. And just like the last time lo those many years before, Sergei got scared and couldn’t get an erection. Still, he liked her, as he later said during his interrogation, so he arranged to meet her the next day. That’s when things got bad. Sergei didn’t remember exactly what the whore did to piss him off, but whatever it was it must have been bad because Sergei pulled out a hunting knife and stabbed her 29 times. H’m, we wonder if his hunting knife was a substitute for his flaccid wee-wee, and if he was screaming, like Tony Montana, “Who laughin now, huh?! Who ha’ tha flacci’ penis now, huh bitch?!”

Something about that experience inspired our predator, because no less than a month later, on November 20th, he called another whore from a newspaper, met her at her apartment on Ulitsa Zelendolskaya, and, when told that he would have to pony up 1500 rubles (the going rate for “sauna” whores in Central Moscow too), he refused and instead stabbed her to death with his trusty hunting knife. Looks like Sergei oughtta stop feeding Viagra to his knife. That thing just can’t get enough pussy!

The whore’s roommate and her roommate’s lover heard screaming, ran in and tried stopping Sergei. Since the whore was already dead, he started stabbing them. The “lover” (read: “john”) pulled out a gas pistol from his belt and managed to shoot Sergei in the face several times, hitting him in the eyes and teeth, before subduing him long enough for the trusty militsia to arrive.

At first Sergei was taken to the hospital rather than to jail because he’d stabbed himself deep and hard in the stomach in order to make it seem that the whore had started stabbing him first and he was just defending himself. However, like Rudntisky’s death porn idiots in Tynda, Sergei had obviously not seen Chopper and thus didn’t know how common this ruse was and how easily the cops would see through it. The minute Sergei’s tummy got healthy, he was charged with two murders and sentenced by the Moscow gorodskoi sud to 20 years in jail and psychiatric treatment.

We at the eXile would tell him that he should be proud of being impotent. Why, we’ve been impotent for years now, and we’ve never been happier. Hell, if we were to get angry and murder a bitch every time we couldn’t get it up, the Moskva river would be a-bobbin full of whore bodies. Oops, uh, wait a minute: the Moskva IS bobbing full of whore corpses. It’s just, heh-heh, see, those aren’t our fault. We swear!

another.. i've always found these amusing *shrug*

ONE DISEMBOWELMENT DOES NOT A SERIAL KILLER MAKE

“A huntin’ we will go/ A huntin’ we will go! ”
A disemboweled woman was discovered between two garage-sheds in the Sviblovo region in Moscow’s northeastern okrug. Locals called the cops after finding the corpse smeared across from Amundsena Ulitsa, dom 12 (for you death porn tourists who want to make a pilgrimage.)

Investigators managed to recreate the scene of the crime for the latest issue of Criminal Weekly (Kriminal Ezhenedelnik). They think it went a little something like this:

First the killer violently beat his victim (she had a broken nose and contusions around her eyes). Then he stabbed her several times with a knife in the chest and stomach and sliced her throat clean through. He was just getting warmed up. After that he sliced out chunks of the muscle tissue in her thighs, hips and buttocks and...yep, he hadda do it... slashed and cut out parts of her vagina.

To quote Kriminal, “Experts do not rule out the possibility that the maniac raped his victim before dealing with her.”

The victim, described as between 25 and 30 years old, was so horribly disfigured that investigators haven’t been able to identify her yet.

So you gotta figure that when the maniac was through with her, she leaned up on her elbows and screamed, like Sam Kinison, “YOU DON’T HAVE TO LEAVE YET NOW, DO YOU? MY HEAD’S STILL ON MY TORSO! HEY, I’M GLAD YOU CAN HANDLE YOUR FUCKING SEXUAL INADEQUECIES!”

For the moment investigators refuse to label her the victim of a serial murder since there hasn’t been a disemboweled woman in that exact spot for a few years now. However in another district last month investigators found the disemboweled corpse of a woman aged 23-25 in an underground perekhod on Volokolamskoye Shosse, dom 9. That time the murderer stabbed the woman five times in the breasts and then slashed her throat.

The best way to end this particular story is the way Kriminal ended their version: “More than likely these two murders were carried out by two absolutely different people, although it’s possible that they are connected to the seasonal aggravation of the illness of psychologically unhealthy people.” Indeed.