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Stolen from PDD, who inturn stoled it from Scott Adams:
I was shocked when I heard the news that the Crocodile Hunter died in a “freak stingray accident.” I had ten dollars bet on “misjudged the speed of a crocodile.” Something tells me that the media already had his obituary written with a fill-in-the-blank for the specific creature that killed him.
Readers of the Dilbert Blog know that I believe death is not a laughing matter, unless the guy who gets killed is in the process of bothering dangerous animals. And by “animals” I include all manner of aquatic, flying, stinging, clawing, bitey things. When someone gets killed doing that sort of thing, it’s a good lesson for the kids. I think it lends credibility when you tell them not to pet strange dogs that are foaming at the mouth. “Don’t pet that dog, Timmy. If you do, you might be killed by an entirely different animal that is not normally considered dangerous. Remember the Crocodile Hunter.”
I remind you that the Crocodile Hunter is the same guy who in 2004 famously fed wild crocodiles with one hand while holding his infant son in the other. Just be glad the Croc Hunter didn’t have triplets because you know he would have tried juggling them.
It seems weird to me that the stingray that got him is now the world’s most famous aquatic creature and doesn’t even know it. He’s probably floating around eating kelp or whatever-the-hell stingrays eat, oblivious to the fact that he’s as famous as O.J. I hope he gets a book deal because I’d like to hear his side of the story. I realize that stingrays have brains the size of a dried raisin, but that doesn’t stop athletes from writing books. All you need is a good co-author.
STINGRAY: “Well, I was minding my own business, eating kelp or whatever-the-hell I eat, when this guy jumps in the water and yells ‘Crikey!’ like a crazy seal. So I killed him and then hired a co-author who is both handsome and talented. You will find his contact information in the back of this well-written book.”
--Scott Adams
p.s. looks like Scott yanked it from his site (tho it remains in google cache  )
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| quote: | | No one wants to die. Even people who want to go to heaven don’t want to die to get there. And yet death is the destination we all share. No one has ever escaped it. And that is as it should be, because Death is very likely the single best invention of Life. It is Life’s change agent. It clears out the old to make way for the new. Right now the new is you, but someday not too long from now, you will gradually become the old and be cleared away. Sorry to be so dramatic, but it is quite true. |
--Steve Jobs (1955 - 2011)
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