i'm a folder, and a tilt-forward-while-half-sitting-and-wiper. you know, my health teacher in middle school told us once that sophisticated people fold, and dumb people scrunch.

and you can't just lean and lift a leg. that's just.. not right. squatting and leaning forward gives you the most openess in the ass-cheek area, and allows for optimal asshole wipe-age.

quote:

Originally posted by Domesticated Yeah, same thing. It's often called shelving because there is a very distinct lip/threshold at the end of your rectum. You have to put the goog right on the shelf for best results.

i'm not hating on you for that or anything, i mean, you gotta do your thing but

is it really that much better to plug the shit? is it really worth sticking your finger two knuckles up your ass? couldn't you just chew and swallow or parachute it instead?

quote:

Originally posted by Domesticated Yeah, same thing. It's often called shelving because there is a very distinct lip/threshold at the end of your rectum. You have to put the goog right on the shelf for best results.

It's called the anal sphincter, and it's what separates your rectum from your colon. Usually about 3/4 of a finger's length up there.

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Originally posted by Omega_Blue i'm not hating on you for that or anything, i mean, you gotta do your thing but is it really that much better to plug the shit? is it really worth sticking your finger two knuckles up your ass? couldn't you just chew and swallow or parachute it instead?

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quote:

Originally posted by Domesticated This morning when I was in the shower I stuck my middle finger knuckle-deep up my bottie because I'm planning on shafting a few pills this weekend and it helps to loosen up. I felt something hard up there and when I pulled my finger out (it feels like taking a shit) there were a few raspberry seeds on there.

Reminds me of the time I was wiping and felt something caught on my arse hair. I gingerly extracted the offending artefact, and found nestled in the toilet paper a very pale green Skittle.

By the way, I sit while wiping, and have mastered the art to the degree I can sit, wipe and continue to read the paper without real difficulty. And not only do I fold the toilet paper, once I've wiped I fold again and reuse, and then fold a third time and reuse for maximum efficiency.

Yeah. I'm pro.

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Mixes:
> Maximum Elevation [Progressive House]
> DI.FM 26th Anniversary Guest Mix [Progressive House]
> Live @ Dance:Love:Hub London, 11.10.2025
> Higher Peaks [Progressive House]
> Dance:Love:Hub Afterparty (The Return) 23.11.24

Like these sets? Come see me play live at Kibosh in Manchester: https://www.instagram.com/kibosh.mcr/

quote:

Originally posted by Domesticated This morning when I was in the shower I stuck my middle finger knuckle-deep up my bottie because I'm planning on shafting a few pills this weekend and it helps to loosen up. I felt something hard up there and when I pulled my finger out (it feels like taking a shit) there were a few raspberry seeds on there.

jesus, youre keen. the fewer times i have to stick my finger in my arse the better as far as i am concerned.

also, since MDMA gives me the squirts, holding the shit in for an eternity to ensure i got the best from the pill was a bit of a hassle. i didnt see nearly enough of an increase in the effects to justify the anal insertion.

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quote:

Originally posted by SYSTEM-J Reminds me of the time I was wiping and felt something caught on my arse hair. I gingerly extracted the offending artefact, and found nestled in the toilet paper a very pale green Skittle. By the way, I sit while wiping, and have mastered the art to the degree I can sit, wipe and continue to read the paper without real difficulty. And not only do I fold the toilet paper, once I've wiped I fold again and reuse, and then fold a third time and reuse for maximum efficiency. Yeah. I'm pro.

Lol. An environmentally conscious shitter. Most impressive.

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quote:

Originally posted by SYSTEM-J Reminds me of the time I was wiping and felt something caught on my arse hair. I gingerly extracted the offending artefact, and found nestled in the toilet paper a very pale green Skittle. By the way, I sit while wiping, and have mastered the art to the degree I can sit, wipe and continue to read the paper without real difficulty. And not only do I fold the toilet paper, once I've wiped I fold again and reuse, and then fold a third time and reuse for maximum efficiency. Yeah. I'm pro.

I thought that all folders re-use? I certainly do. Three times is uncommon though, my normal wipe process only involves a second usage of the paper before it goes in the toilet.

quote:

Originally posted by Omega_Blue i'm not hating on you for that or anything, i mean, you gotta do your thing but is it really that much better to plug the shit? is it really worth sticking your finger two knuckles up your ass? couldn't you just chew and swallow or parachute it instead?

Try it. It really is that much better. I can't remember the exact statistics, but your rectum absorbs a pill much more efficiently than your stomach. I find it's a much 'cleaner', stronger and sustained intoxication.

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Mix archive | Melbourne club guide

quote:

Originally posted by Sushipunk Lol. An environmentally conscious shitter. Most impressive.

Fuck the rainforests. Good toilet paper is expensive, and I'd rather not use the cheap stuff that feels like you're sanding down your arsehole.

___________________
Mixes:
> Maximum Elevation [Progressive House]
> DI.FM 26th Anniversary Guest Mix [Progressive House]
> Live @ Dance:Love:Hub London, 11.10.2025
> Higher Peaks [Progressive House]
> Dance:Love:Hub Afterparty (The Return) 23.11.24

Like these sets? Come see me play live at Kibosh in Manchester: https://www.instagram.com/kibosh.mcr/

quote:

Originally posted by SYSTEM-J Fuck the rainforests. Good toilet paper is expensive, and I'd rather not use the cheap stuff that feels like you're sanding down your arsehole.

Yeah I don't understand people who buy the rough toilet paper. You have a choice, why would you willingly choose something that makes your date bleed?

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Mix archive | Melbourne club guide

Unless you have a damn good reason, standing up to wipe is for 5 year old's who want to marvel at what came out of their asshole like a new mother and her baby..

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Last edited by iTranscendence on Oct-09-2009 at 04:00

Revisiting this, here's a great tip on how to save toilet paper:

So this guy asks the chick how much toilet paper she uses to whipe, then explains his revolutionary technique to save paper. I don't think a translation is necessary, the gestures should be pretty self-explanatory.

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