sorry to hear about your pains ste , just be more safe you know that can only help



Mikey that story you said was hillarious , I remember when I used to work in a food store we'd have fights with fruits, or take like an apple shrink wrap it and then stick it in the microwave the whole damn thing would turn to apple sauce ... ah so much fun at that job , once I remember I was speeding around the stock area with a tow truck and I knocked over a 6 high x 10 wide meters furniture and the whole thing fell ...... on a guy that was riding on the front of the tow truck ( mind you I was backing up ) ROFL we laughed so hard but I could have nearly killed him and it took us like an hour to clean up all the mess , but it was only stuff for packaging and labels and administrative documents so no biggie

quote:

Originally posted by DJ Mikey Mike dunno.. and once at work we put some eggs in the microwave copying jack dee, and it blew the mircowave door off, which funnily enuf also happened to jack dee A part of the door flew past me and hit someone else which was a bonus

*puts eggs in microwave and sets timer for wen evil housemate walks into kitchen

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Beware of killer hamsters and the random running dogs.

Not my story, but my bro was cooking by himself in his flat (beans on toast most likely) he turned away from the cooker, turned back He then caught his reflection in the kitchen window. sumhow he'd managed to set the back of his sweater on fire (from an electric cooker i have no idea how!!!) and had to jump in the shower to put himself out.

It singed the back of his hair and ruined the sweater (that i had given him for xmas) luckily no burns but could of bin alot werse the silly stoner

I'm a good cook however I have hurt many people and nearly destroyed my house due to trying to cook.

One time I was drunk and about 7 of us piled into my manor and sat and watched some films we'd visited to petrol station for cigs, magazines, drink, food, etc. And I remember me and my mate Danny went to my kitchen to make cuppa's for everyone Danny came in as he had a pot noddle, I remember boiling the Kettle, and my mate Johnny stands in the doorway and says something to me I turn to him whilst pouring water from the kettle into the pot noddle then I hear Danny go fucking HELL! as he'd been steadying the pot in a few seconds of me turning my head I'd realised I'd poured scoulding hot water from the kettle alls over Dannys hands.

In my old house I must of been about 13 and our toaster had bust the button you pull down had bust, but the toaster still worked but you had to hold the button down, however I had some genius idea that if I put a kitchen weight on it and came back a minute later I would have toast, however I forgot and went into the garden, I thought fuck toast! ran back into my house which was thick with smoke and got to the kitchen seeing flames nearly reaching the ceiling, I remember sort of panicking at first then grabbing a wooden spoon and knocking the weight off the button the flames died down after about 15 seconds, but the smoke was still in the house for about 2 days.

We used to have these kitchen knives which my ma had sharpened and I swear they were sharper then a Samuri sword. I was about 12 and me and my mate Marc were messing around with them, I remember going to cut a piece of hard plastic the knife slipped and nearly sliced off the top of my thumb it was hanging off my a flap of skin, it didn't hurt because the knife was so sharp it just glided through, I ran to the toliet in my house and blood was spurting out litteraly shooting across my house, I used loads of water and wrapped my hand up in tissue paper I then noticed I'd coated the wall with blood in the bog, so whilst I sat in the living room my mate Marc tried his best to clear the blood off the walls, I knew my Ma would go mad so we went to my best mate Sebs house later on, I stayed round and I remember at Brekkie his Ma noticed my thumb wrapped style in tissue and she goe's 'Keir whats happened to your thumb' I told her what happened and she reallys I used to be a nurse btw and she got out all these butterfly stiches and wrapping stuff and dealt with it, when I got home I got bollocked for covering the bog walls in blood.

So as you've all gathered I can cook but I'm a bit of spastic sometimes in the kitchen.

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