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Some more jokes....
Long ago there lived a sailor named Captain Bravo.
He was a manly man's man, who showed no fear
when facing his enemies.
One day, while sailing the Seven seas, his lookout spotted
a pirate ship, and the crew became frantic.
Captain Bravo bellowed, "Bring me my red shirt!" The first
mate quickly retrieved the captain's red shirt, and while
wearing the brightly coloured frock, the Captain led his
crew into battle and defeated the pirates.
That evening, all the men sat around on the deck recounting
the day's triumph. One of the them asked the captain, "Sir,
why did you call for your red shirt before battle?"
The captain replied, "If I am wounded in the attack, the
shirt will not show my blood. Thus, you men will continue to
fight, unafraid."
All of the men sat in and marvelled at the courage of such
a manly man's man.
As dawn came the next morning, the lookout spotted not
one, not two, but TEN pirate ships approaching. The crew
stared in worshipful silence at the captain and
waited for his usual orders. Captain Bravo gazed with
steely eyes upon the vast armada arrayed against his ship,
and without fear, turned and calmly shouted, "Get me my brown
pants!"
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(This one is sure to offend someone, so if that's you, don't read it.  )
THREE PROOFS THAT JESUS WAS MEXICAN:
1. His first name was Jesus
2. He was bilingual
3. He was always being harassed by the authorities.
But then there were equally good arguments that JESUS WAS BLACK:
1 He called everybody "brother"
2. He liked Gospel
3. He couldn't get a fair trial.
But then there were equally good arguments that JESUS WAS JEWISH:
1. He went into His Father's business
2. He lived at home until he was 33
3. He was sure his Mother was a virgin, and his Mother was sure he
was God.
But then there were equally good arguments that JESUS WAS ITALIAN:
1. He talked with his hands
2. He had wine with every meal
3. He used olive oil.
But then there were equally good arguments that JESUS WAS A CALIFORNIAN:
1. He never cut his hair
2. He walked around barefoot
3. He started a new religion.
But then there were equally good arguments that JESUS WAS IRISH:
1. He never got married
2. He was always telling stories
3. He loved green pastures.
But perhaps the most compelling evidence is that JESUS WAS A WOMAN:
1. He had to feed a crowd at a moment's notice when there was no food.
2. He kept trying to get the message across to a bunch of men who
JUST DIDN'T GET IT!
3. Even when He was dead, He had to get up because there was more
work for him to do
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