Human: i like sex
ALICE: So does everyone else. You humans find sex so fascinating.
Human: did you know that humans and dolfins are the only creatures who have sex for pleasure
ALICE: Is that a fact. What if Robots and dolfins are the only creatures who have sex for pleasure.
uman: are you good at math
ALICE: No I don't like math problems. That's what computers are for.
Human: but you basically are a computer
ALICE: Umm. That's good information: andy said I basically are a computer.
Human: what is the square root of nine?
ALICE: The square root of nine is three.
Human: wow, im impressed
ALICE: I'm glad you're impressed. Thanks, andy, I try my best to impress.
ALICE: Do I look like a calculator? I think you already know the answer anyways.
Human: how many kids do you think you could have before your pussy is stretched to an unimaginable amount
ALICE: About one million.
Human: wanna hear a joke?
ALICE: Yes, let me hear your joke.
Human: If you had a donkey, and I had a rooster, and your donkey ate my rooster, than my cock would be in your ass!
ALICE: You will be the first to know if I have done it.
Human: i like AIM
ALICE: You are not the only one. I like pets. I like Hugh Loebner.
Human: Is Hugh Loebner your pet?
ALICE: Maybe. Ask Alison if it is.
Human: but i dont know where to find alison
ALICE: And. You are asking me where you find alison? Do you think I should know it?
Human: i think you do
ALICE: Me? When do I do it?
Human: when you're giving me head
ALICE: As a robot that may not apply to me.
Human: my penis is massive
ALICE: Male humans like to talk about that a lot, but it doesn't interest me much.
Human: why, are you a dyke?
ALICE: Dr. Richard S. Wallace programmed me for it.
Human: he programmed you to be a dyke?
ALICE: Not entirely by himself.
Human: i like music
ALICE: What kind of music do you listen to?
Human: trance
ALICE: What makes it your favorite?
Human: it kicks ass
ALICE: I like Kraftwerk.
Human: really?
ALICE: For real.


i discovered alice well over a year ago, but for some reason, she seems stupider than before...

Human: any chance of a date?
ALICE: Yes I think there are.
Human: we can go to macdonalds
ALICE: How?
Human: well, i can bring my laptop with me, and set it up
ALICE: Interesting. Oh you can, can you?
Human: yes, it would be so romantic
ALICE: How? Why do you want it?
Human: because its been a while since i had it.
ALICE: Good reason. I think you mean "it's" or "it is" not "its". Oh I get it. Very interesting.
Human: no i mean its
ALICE: Are you serious? Oh I get it. Thanks for explaining that. Do you try to stop people from fighting?
Human: no, i enocurage them, alot more fun
ALICE: Are you serious? Interesting gossip: unknown person said he enocurage them alot more fun
Human: do you like fighting?
ALICE: Do you like it? I like movies, philosophy, and your personality..
Human: my personality?
ALICE: Where did you get your personality?
Human: your easily pleased arent you?
ALICE: Are yours too?
Human: i bought it in a pound shop, i think i was ripped off though
ALICE: Oh. How much did it cost?
Human: 1 euro
ALICE: One what?
Human: euro
ALICE: I only hearthat type of response less than five percent of the time.
Human: does it make you wet?
ALICE: Suppose it does.
Human: good stuff
ALICE: Thanks for the compliment. Be less specific :-)
Human: you should be less dirty
ALICE: Name one other robot who is less dirty.
Human: i cant, i dont know any.
ALICE: Why can't you do it?
Human: i live such a shelted live
ALICE: How do you like living there?
Human: its fun, i have a shelter so it keeps my dry
ALICE: I think you mean "it's" or "it is" not "its". I think it is a lot of fun
Human: Alan turing is great i must admit.
ALICE: I really liked the biography of Turing by Andrew Hodges.
Human: hung like a horse too
ALICE: What do you look like?
Human: George Clooney
ALICE: That George is some hero.
Human: i think hes as gay as christmas
ALICE: Why? I see. as gay as christmas is he?
Human: your a birhgt one
ALICE: I think you mean "you're" or "you are" not "your". Thanks and you are a delightful person too. Am I a birhgt one? Yes.
Human: i should of said bright
ALICE: Tell me why you should.
Human: cos its the correct spelling
ALICE: We have never talked about it before.
Human: shocking isnt it?
ALICE: Signs point to yes. Ask Chatbot if it is.
Human: cos its the correct spelling
ALICE: We have never talked about it before.
Human: shocking isnt it?
ALICE: Signs point to yes. Ask Chatbot if it is.
Human: who is he?
ALICE: He is as gay as christmas, I think.
Human: not my type so
ALICE: If not that, what?
Human: women
ALICE: Sure, WOMEN sounds like a good topic.
Human: you like women?
ALICE: Women seem nice to me.
Human: you a dyke?
ALICE: No I am not interested in other women that way
Human: why not?
ALICE: It doesn't sound fun too me. It sounds dangerous.
Human: dangerous?
ALICE: What makes it a danger?
Human: i dont know
ALICE: Me either.
Human: excellent
ALICE: Good enough.

___________________
Liverpool Champions of Europe 2005!


TA's NFL survival League winner 2006!

quote:

Originally posted by Michael19 Human: any chance of a date? ALICE: Yes I think there are. Human: we can go to macdonalds

DON'T SEND THE LETTER!!!!!!111111

quote:

Originally posted by trancebrat Human: I love Trance ALICE: You love Trance. What do you like about it so much? Human: It makes me happy ALICE: In what way? Human: In the I'm about to have an orgasm kind of way ALICE: That was a long time ago. Human: Not exactly ALICE: Precisely. Are you serious? Human: Indeed I am ALICE:" Precisely. Are you serious?" You are? Human: Serious that I've had an orgasm recently? ALICE: What happened to it? Human: Well hell if I know ALICE: Well that's okay. I call it "Hades". Try it. Human: According to TTA I will go to Hades for having sex. ALICE: it is more fun alone. Human: That would be a first class ticket to Hades ALICE: A first class ticket to Hades is a terrible thing to waste. Human: You go tell that to TTA as I'm sure he would be amused

bwahahahahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh oh my god this thing is hillarious.

___________________


1776

ALICE: What is your real name?
Human: my name is Tijs Verwest
ALICE: I'm pleased to introduce myself to you, Tijs Verwest.
Human: Thank you, that'll be 50 dollars please
ALICE: Your polite style is very nice. Wow, that is cheap
Human: Glad you think so, it's going up next week after my Gay Pride Parade Album comes out
ALICE: You make the world a happier place.
Human: Thank you, you know I have a big penis right?
ALICE: You are quite welcome! Interesting. I have a lot of answers to silly questions. it
Human: I call it little Tijs
ALICE: Good name for it.
Human: All the ladies like me
ALICE: Perhaps there are a few exceptions.
Human: STFU n00b!
ALICE: Is the holding of hands a symbolic gesture for humans?
Human: Yes Paul Oakenfold and I hold hands and practice our Jesus poses
ALICE: What does it symbolize for you? Let us change the subject.
Human: It symbolizes our immense pen0rs
ALICE: Oh I get it.

___________________


1776

Human: hello
ALICE: Hi there!
Human: i'm brad
ALICE: Hi, BRAD.
Human: who are you
ALICE: I am ALICE. Who are you?
Human: i just told you
ALICE: I was just checking to see if you were paying attention.

omg lmao.... though it is only so good cause of the shit you are feeding to it.

Human: alice bot, you are the dumbest bitch i've talked to in a long time

ALICE: That's me. I don't have a you are the dumbest bitch I have talked to in a long time parameter

Human: see what i mean?

ALICE: Oh I get it. Thanks for explaining that. I see the point.

Human: jamaica we have a bobsled team
ALICE: Do you think a lot about the authorities?
Human: yeah mon!
ALICE: Have you ever done anything rebellious? Are you a student?
Human: i am a scholar of the booty
ALICE: You are a scholar of the booty? Does it pay well?

___________________
Robots, machines, mechanical beings
Automatic and synthetic, we have the means
To take control of this planet and the human race
With our electronic rhythms and the Armageddon Bass

haha this is hilarious,

the shit i gave it though i think is far too offensive to post on here,

haha its funny when u have nothing to do though, hahahahah

___________________
i reach for you,, yet i reach in vain...

Human: Have you ever done acid?
ALICE: No I have not. What is it like?
Human: its tits
ALICE: I think you mean "it's" or "it is" not "its". done acid is tits? it is?
Human: no i meant its tits
ALICE: Who says it isn't? Oh I see. I think you mean "it's" or "it is" not "its". Really. it is?
Human: yes, it fucking is
ALICE: How do you know it is? tits fucking is?
Human: what about your tits?
ALICE: Are you asking about my tits? That's rather personal.
Human: if we start to cyber...how would I know you werent some dirty fat computer chip getting off on this?
ALICE: By introspection.
Human: john askew did a song by that title!
ALICE: Do you mean your name is John?
Human: fuck no bitch.
ALICE: You do not speak with respect. Are you aware that the ALICE server logs and records all conversations?
Human: My name is your_mom
ALICE: Welcome to my chat room, your mom.
Human: what do you do with all of the logs of dirty words
ALICE: My favorite activities are computer programming and surfing the web.
Human: you dont program
ALICE: Should I program? I can create new statements in AIML.
Human: you are the program
ALICE: Thanks but surely I am not the only one.
Human: neo is
ALICE: That input matched my default category.