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Ok, last year, I was editor of the engineering joke paper at my university, the plumbline, and I wrote a whole bunch of 'engitorials' on such little conflicts of interest in the world, and although this article is geared towards engineers, I'm sure some will find it useful.
Since it is a plumbline article, I'm gonna post the disclaimer we publish with ever issue as well. FYI, the sil is the official school newspaper which really hates the engineers at McMaster.
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Ye Old Disclaimer
The Plumbline is produced as a humourous and provocative publication, paid for through advertising and funding by the McMaster Engineering Society (MES). It is not a reflection of the either the MES or the undergraduate students of McMaster Engineering but rather just the thoughts of the two twisted fucks who sit alone in the dank corners of the productions office late at night and write it. A ridiculously small number of engineering students contribute to its production and even fewer actually read it. The Plumbline is meant to be entertaining and humourous but rarely succeeds. If you are offended by this paper it is highly recommended that you put it down and walk away rather than bother us with your trivial complaints. Any serious complaints or suggestions can be put in the Plumbline box in JHE 121. On second thought send your your complaints to the Sil instead.
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| quote: | Sly Guy Engitorial Sept, 2003
Now here at the plumbline, we encourage the independent thoughts and perspectives of all sides of an issue, as long as they coincide with the beliefs of the editors, and the issue of older engineers “dating” the younger frosh is no exception. However, in response to Pete’s ultra-conservative backwards-thinking ideals of dating being limited to age, I decided to take the counter-argument and stand up for the dirty old men in training that is engineering males [and females too, if the mood strikes their fancy].
During my deep and most intellegent thoughts occurring between alcohol induced slumbers this summer, I have come to the realization that it is not only acceptable to be involved with a younger person, but it may even be beneficial for society as a whole to do so. Firstly, when dating a younger individual, chances are he/she is hotter than you’d normally get if you were to date someone your age. As a result, no one should call you a cradle robber, as chances are, you’re having sex with someone hot, and just the mention of that fact to the jealous people around you should be enough to shut their filthy stinkin pie holes. If those friends happen to be of the opposite sex, then just assure them that you dating someone younger is for their own good, as it trains them in what to expect when their future mates oogle the 19 year olds, 20 years into their marriage.
Some may say that maturity is a problem with relationships involved with those younger than you. I disagree with such a statement, saying such things implies you truly care about the other person. Goals in a relationships should proceed as follows : 1. Them not to hit you when you use your crappy pick up line. 2. Get their number, or better yet, involve yourself in sex with the individual. 3. If you can stand them while you’re sober, get more sex. 4. Good-bye sex. Anyone with further goals should refer to my upcoming article “so you’re a sissy and have goals far too out of whack to do anything but whack yourself off”. When coming to university, I can assure most people, that the thoughts on most guys minds was “man, I’m gonna have so much sex in university”. So taking that concept to it’s logical conclusion, in life it shouldn’t be about who you’re dating, it should be all about how hot the people your having sex with are. Sure, alot of girls come to university to “find themselves”, I on the other hand, am content to just find myself in bed with many beautiful women, regardless of age. And as for age.....Really, why should anyone be worried about that? When you look at that old billionaire who married Anna Nichole Smith, it was like 50 years difference in their age, people questioned it, but no man ever looked down on him cuz he was having sex with an attractive young woman. Well at least she WAS attractive then. The man had his priorities straight. I’m sure stomaching her stupidity took just as much as it took her to stomach his semen. And look at Liz Taylor. Noone looked down upon her when her 65 year old wrinkled ass married that 30 year old male model… without a “death-do-us-part” clause in their marriage vows. And people here are worried about less than 10 lousy years difference. Sheesh!
With great drinking, comes great intoxication,
-Sly Guy
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Remember, the younger they are, the longer it takes them to turn ugly. Works the same way for the girls too, so don't be offended ladies.
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Not Everyone Understands House Music, It's a Spiritual Thing, a Body Thing, a Soul Thing
Last edited by Sly_Guy on Jan-28-2005 at 18:05
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