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Here's my story:
So I'm straight rockin' out on the Stairmaster at the gym, working up a sweat before I hit the weights. I'm in perfect view of the entrance to the gym, so I can see all the people walking in. In walks this dude and just the sight of him infuriates me. He's wearing this hat:
Keep in mind that it's about 8pm, so there is no sunlight outside and it's approx 40 degrees and this hat is not a keep-your-head-warm hat. My impulse was to shout, right in the midst of the gym, 'Hey you! In the hat! YOU! FUCK YOU!' and give him the biggest middle finger I could muster. But I didn't.
Instead I just farted near him in the locker room a bit later. POWNED!
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