quote:

I like to masturbate with a trophy that I got from playing softball years ago in middle school.

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i have been at a friends house and when she had gone to the bathroom i went in her hamper and smelled a thong or hers, it intoxicated me

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When no one was home, I once pulled out this huge Charmander doll and started humping it. It was just so cuddly. Then I put his mouth on my dick and started making his head go back and forth on it

and my favorite:

quote:

I read other peoples confessions and then go out and act on them

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Originally posted by Idoru I'm cooler than you plus i give better head i swallow

It is easier for a man to destroy the light inside himself
than to defeat the darkness all around him
www.myspace.com/enigmaticecstasy

ahhahahahaha!!! Oh it hurts to laugh now.

How did you stumble upon this site?

quote:

around christmas time, when im horney, i take a candy cane off the christmas tree and unwrap it and masterbate with it. i know its sick but candy turns me on. after i masterbate with it, i stick it back on the tree. i think one of my younger siblings ate one of them one time. i know its sick, but i cant help it.

So that's why the candy cane is red and WHITE.

to go along with the candy canes:

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I went to my family reunion, and they told me to bring potato salad. So, I masterbated in it, and laughed as they all ate it...

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quote:

Originally posted by Idoru I'm cooler than you plus i give better head i swallow

It is easier for a man to destroy the light inside himself
than to defeat the darkness all around him
www.myspace.com/enigmaticecstasy

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i like to smear banana all around my asshole and then have my girlfriend eat it.

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i once gave oral sex to my mum's best friend. she was 49 and I was 17. she's dead now.

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i love chicken so much i bought one skilled it stuffed and and used it as my sex doll cuz i was to much of a loner to get a dog

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I masturbated with a matzah ball

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Sometimes I shit in mailboxes. I don't know why.

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my dad found a condom wrapper. if only he knew i wasnt having sex i was using it on his brush.

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quote:

Originally posted by Idoru I'm cooler than you plus i give better head i swallow

It is easier for a man to destroy the light inside himself
than to defeat the darkness all around him
www.myspace.com/enigmaticecstasy

quote:

931723001 One time when i was 13 i was laying on my teddy bear and was rubbing my girlyhood, well i started to dry hump it, and rub it on myself... it actually felt good, the next morning i felt so odd'

wow.

wow...people all over the world are funny

sad thing is, i doubt most of these people are making these up.

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Originally posted by inconspicuous AndreaCKY772. just. so. dumb.

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Originally posted by AndreaCKY772 wow...people all over the world are funny sad thing is, i doubt most of these people are making these up.

Really? I think it's the other way around. People are probably just writing dumb shit for a laugh.

quote:

Originally posted by Frenchie Really? I think it's the other way around. People are probably just writing dumb shit for a laugh.

probably true. but i bet even for the fake ones, there is someone in the world and in history who has done what was posted, or some variation of it!

edit:

"I am staying over my brother's house for a while. I was just watching TV with his wife and she fell asleep on the couch. I could see right down her top and it got me so hard. I jerked off right there with her sleeping next to me on the couch. It was the biggest rush I ever had."

"I've been having sex with my 23 year old cousin for about 6 months now...she's just told me she's pregnant and that the baby is mine. both our parents are gonna freak when they find out as she doesn't believe in abortion so she's got to have the baby. I'll stand by her and support the baby but the bad part is I'm worried about the sex with her stopping."

"i've slept with more guys than you think:
c
b
k
a
n
p
and i've messed around with:
m
a

it's all in the past, but i'll never tell you because we are getting married and no one wants to marry a slut.
ps - one of those was your own brother, and his dick is bigger than yours. i'm sorry"

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Originally posted by inconspicuous AndreaCKY772. just. so. dumb.

Last edited by AndreaCKY772 on Mar-26-2007 at 21:35

quote:

I killed the person that raped my wife. I tracked him down and beat him until he passed out. I tied him up and waited for him to wake up. I slit his throat and watched him slowly die. He made noises like a dying pig as he gasped for air through his throat. The last thing he saw was a picture of my wife. While he was dying I constantly wispered how he was going to hell for what he did. I burried him under an orange tree out in a grove. He's now labeled as a missing person, my wife is scared to be in the house alone and is pregnant. We aren't sure if the baby is his or mine. I may go to hell for killing this person but something had to be done. He couldn't be allowed to live to ruin the life of another person.

So... do we think this is real?

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