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Something I composed for my blog a while back....
The ladies' online guide to using men's urinals
How to use a men's urinal... for Ladies
by yours truly http://ajenicek.blogspot.com/2006_12_01_archive.html
Long lineups at ladies' washrooms in nightclubs and public events can be overwhelming. When you gotta go, you gotta go. Many a times I have seen ladies give up the ladies queue, and head for the men's washrooms to use the easy in/out access priveledges. Sure the stall lines are smaller... and that's OK with us guys, especially if you're hot. But what if you REALLY gotta go, and can't wait to use even a men's stall? I've observed the desparate, and documented the proper and improper techniques of using the men's urinal. Yes, even YOU can use the men's urinal. Allow me to show you how.
First, there's the Wall-Facing Position.
Subject no.1 may be cute, but would turn me off if she tries to pee like that. Her back is not tilted at the required 40-50 degree angle. Her pants have not been lowered enough, thus resulting in a very wet groin area, and still would not hit it, as the 'I spilt my drink' excuse just wouldn't fly with me.
Subject no.1
Proper wall-facing position requires good front projectile clearance. Subject no.2 displays her pants fully lowered, or skirt, giving adequate spray angles. Also displaying expert technique, she is about to move her panties to the side, rather than pulling them down to the floor. Because that just wouldn't be lady-like.
Subject no.2
Finally there's the Booty to the Wall Position.
This is commonly the more common method of female urinal usage that results in the most minimal clothing spillage. Use the urinal like you would use a european squat-hole. First lower your garments, but not all the way to the floor so as to not wet them from previous less experienced girls's mis-spray. Rather than squating all the way down, bend your knees slightly, and back up towards the wall like train engine backs to connects to the rest of the train.
Be very careful not to back your caboose too far back, as the porcelain feels very cold. Have you ever sat on a toilet in a club but forgot to lower the seat? Subject no.3 illustrates the incorrect method of the Booty to the Wall position.
Subject no.3
Proper Booty to the Wall position involves careful, but easy to do when necessary techniques that will provide you with immediate relief in time of crisis, and may even score you a few dates. Subject no.4, 5 and 6 display a succesful urinary accomplishment. See? It's fun!
Subject no.4
Subject no.5
Subject no.6
So have fun... practice the urinals each night out, and soon, you'll be able to write your name in snow with a little skill and patience. However, if you find ladies like these using them before you. You may just like to come back at a later time.
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Short time TA, Long time Guver, Good time giver.
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thats worse! 
