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enydo
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Registered: Jan 2008
Location: NYC

Old Post Apr-01-2010 19:14 
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sweetcaroline
On Location in Motor City



Registered: May 2006
Location: Philadelphia, USA

I appreciate the responses. I know I'm being a protective girlfriend, but I can't help it. I love my friend. And I spent 5 months of him talking about the pain of the breakup. Right when he was healing, his ex boyfriend breezes back in town and chases after him. Oh, did I mention that my friend is gay? Anyway, it doesn't matter...

I think his ex is evil because he saw that my friend was happy and dating someone new and chased after him. And his ex is leaving town to go overseas in August. So basically, the ex is going fuck around with my friend for a few months and then good bye. I met the new boyfriend and he was pretty amazing, not the tormented closet case the ex is.

Do we have a self destructive gene that makes us go back to people who have hurt us time and time again?

Why do exes have more pull than the world of new experiences that are out there?

Old Post Apr-01-2010 19:42  United States
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Yohan
Champion of Deep&Nu-disco



Registered: Jan 2004
Location: Kitchener, Ont, Soviet Canuckistan

because humans are stupid


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lol colour me retarded

Old Post Apr-01-2010 19:47  Canada
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enydo
~



Registered: Jan 2008
Location: NYC

Ah, well I guess the magic pussy explanation is out. Magic colon perhaps?

Old Post Apr-01-2010 19:49 
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Arbiter
Naked Power Organ



Registered: May 2002
Location:

quote:
Originally posted by sweetcaroline
Do we have a self destructive gene that makes us go back to people who have hurt us time and time again?


Some people do. They tend to get what they deserve.

Old Post Apr-01-2010 19:49 
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denys envy
no scratch, no snatch...



Registered: Mar 2004
Location: falLAcy, CA

quote:
Originally posted by enydo
Ah, well I guess the magic pussy explanation is out. Magic colon perhaps?


or a magic mouth

Old Post Apr-01-2010 19:58  Russia
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Magadansky
Trees of Psychedelia



Registered: Jun 2006
Location: Sofia

quote:
Originally posted by igottaknow
Let me clarify. I'm not making a judgment on which girl is better for his friend, and I'm sure he means well. But you can not tell someone what they should do. Everyone is free to make their own choices and live with the consequences. Their choices shouldn't make you angry. Why do people concern themselves with what other people do?

Let me give you another scenario. We walk into a restaurant and I tell you I read an article about all the wonderful health benefits of eating salad. After which I order a salad and you get a double cheeseburger with bacon. Now I'm furious with you. Why didn't you order the salad? Didn't you hear what I told you? Clearly the salad is better for you...

Not the same thing. A few people on here already said that people are self-destructive and stupid in some of those situations and they need to be warned and protected. You shouldn't getting angry out of it but you need to protect your friends from them making mistakes. And yes OP is concerned since they are best friends. You know, actually caring for each other...


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Old Post Apr-01-2010 20:07  Bulgaria
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igottaknow
PerfectTeeth R4 Dinosaurs



Registered: Feb 2001
Location: The Future

so the he (op) is a she and the she (ex) is a he.

Old Post Apr-01-2010 20:09 
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bas
Stronger Lover



Registered: Jul 2004
Location: Here I Am Baby

Pretty simple really. People like what's familiar/comfortable to them.


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Old Post Apr-01-2010 20:09  Egypt
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igottaknow
PerfectTeeth R4 Dinosaurs



Registered: Feb 2001
Location: The Future

quote:
Originally posted by Magadansky
Not the same thing.

Ok. We a walk into a restaurant and we are best friends...
Now that changes everything right?

quote:
A few people on here already said that people are self-destructive and stupid in some of those situations and they need to be warned and protected. You shouldn't getting angry out of it but you need to protect your friends from them making mistakes. And yes OP is concerned since they are best friends. You know, actually caring for each other...

You are free to tell someone what you think. What's unreasonable is expecting them to do what you want and getting angry when they don't. She views his ex as a problem, her friend doesn't share her view otherwise he wouldn't be with his ex. No one can be saved from themselves. That's why an alcoholic can not be told to stop drinking, he has to want to.

Old Post Apr-01-2010 20:23 
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Danny Ocean
Throwin' Shapes



Registered: Dec 2003
Location: Absinthe Party at the Fly Honey Warehouse

i dont think she's getting angry at him..she just said the phrase in a different context.

Old Post Apr-01-2010 20:37  Italy
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Magadansky
Trees of Psychedelia



Registered: Jun 2006
Location: Sofia

quote:
Originally posted by igottaknow
Ok. We a walk into a restaurant and we are best friends...
Now that changes everything right?


You are free to tell someone what you think. What's unreasonable is expecting them to do what you want and getting angry when they don't. She views his ex as a problem, her friend doesn't share her view otherwise he wouldn't be with his ex. No one can be saved from themselves. That's why an alcoholic can not be told to stop drinking, he has to want to.

Lol. Do you know what friendship is? What do you think a friend must do, drinking with you all night and not giving you advices about your life, advices that can help you? Do you have friends actually for whom you care about or you truly believe this is the universal case (your quoted phrases above)?


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Old Post Apr-01-2010 21:01  Bulgaria
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