quote:

Originally posted by Miss Pie It's not rocket surgery. Tuning into people isn't some special trick.

By your word, describing it somehow eludes you. Sounds rather special to me; some inexplicable empathic ability of yours worthy of mention.

Sounds spooky!

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There are more things in heaven and earth, Horatio,
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It's not that simple. I had a long term ex girlfriend who classified herself as asexual. She was sexually assaulted as her first sexual experience, had no sexual partners until me. She and I still had sex regularly, but she always maintained that the actual act of intercourse was not appealing to her, and that the only reason she enjoyed it with me was for the intimacy of it. A lot of asexual people still have sex, they just don't have the innate desire to have it for no reason other than it feeling good.

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quote:

Originally posted by OrangestO This isn't about physics, this is about waves.

quote:

Originally posted by Lira Actually, it's quite hard for blokes to "tune into people" like that. I learnt something from loads of female friends and my current long relationship but unless it was really obvious, I was oblivious to most stuff happening in my surroundings before I turned twenty.

I disagree. I don't think it has anything to do with gender. Either you know how to pick up on the subtleties of communication (verbal and non) or you don't.

However I will agree that many people are oblivious. To the messages they send as well as the messages they receive.

Mark me down as another oblivious person. Sexual "vibes" have to be pretty blatant before I notice it.

You're not oblivious; You're obfuscated.

___________________
There are more things in heaven and earth, Horatio,
Than are dreamt of in your philosophy.

I don't get it. How can you not be conscious of your non-verbal communication? How you position your body in relation to another person, what your gestures are saying, what your facial expressions are doing? What the fuck, why are you stupid?

See? She just oozes with empathy. Don't you all get that "vibe"?

___________________
There are more things in heaven and earth, Horatio,
Than are dreamt of in your philosophy.

quote:

Originally posted by Miss Pie I disagree. I don't think it has anything to do with gender. Either you know how to pick up on the subtleties of communication (verbal and non) or you don't.

True, but blokes tend to pay less attention to this sort of thing. Don't take my word for it: make a survey and see if your male friends really are as capable as your female friends.

I'm willing to bet a button of the shirt I'm wearing that they aren't.

quote:

Originally posted by Miss Pie However I will agree that many people are oblivious. To the messages they send as well as the messages they receive.

We're definitely in agreement here

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quote:

Originally posted by Miss Pie I don't get it. How can you not be conscious of your non-verbal communication? How you position your body in relation to another person, what your gestures are saying, what your facial expressions are doing? What the fuck, why are you stupid?

Actually, I am hyper-conscious of my non-verbal communication. My problem is in figuring out what "vibes" another person is trying to send, not in projecting my own. At least, it seems that way.

Maybe I am just self-absorbed.

quote:

Originally posted by Halcyon+On+On See? She just oozes with empathy. Don't you all get that "vibe"?

You're an idiot. I'm definitely getting that vibe.

Your claims remind me of Ania.

___________________
There are more things in heaven and earth, Horatio,
Than are dreamt of in your philosophy.

you guys are really that oblivious to subtle sexual signals? maybe it is because I'm horny all of the time, but it isn't rocket science. do you guys just wait for "let's fuck"? seems to me that body language gives it away every time when a woman wants her pipes clean. don't paint "all blokes" with the same brush lira. if you have enough experience in social situations with the opposite sex, you can usually tell within a few seconds if they are attracted and interested by body language and how they listen or communicate.