Push her down the stairs. Just wait until she is in high heels, then it will look like an accident.

___________________

quote:

Originally posted by ziptnf I probably wake up QWOPing.

Did you not know immediately that you had made a mistake? Because you can get the morning after pill over the counter, you know. How the fuck can people be this fucking stupid? And now you're going to give the world another fucking moron for the rest of us to clean up after. Thanks a lot.

Honestly how can anyone be dumb enough not to know whether or not they've pumped a load into someone/received a load from someone??? Fucking amateurs.

quote:

Originally posted by Lira Man the hell up. You're going to be a dad, you'll definitely need it. I mean, really. It would be completely understandable if you brought this idea to the table had your girlfriend been raped by a deranged animal who had testosterone pumps for a brain. But you're a healthy individual - healthy enough to trick a girl into letting you spit your genetic material inside her bleed-box. A healthy individual who can vote, drive, and drink - and even get hammered on your way to the voting booth (that is, a healthy individual with the occasional really bad idea). When you decided to play transvaginal ultrasound examination with her, you KNEW your tool could be an instrument of mass construction. You also knew you could simply ask her to swallow your 100% natural mold-flavoured yogurt and/or have your meat thermometer up her bum. And you decided to go ahead and go with your head where you hoped no other man would be. Or come. Now face the consequences like the grown-up man you ought to be.

My Mother had me when she was 20. I remember growing up and adjusting to her youth

simply because she was not ready to be a parent yet. I lived in Russia till I was 11, then I

moved to America. Yes, Russia. My mother left my dad, only to later describe the divorce as

lack of empathy and communication on both sides. I was mind-fucked because growing up

without a dad, my mother had to become more strict, abusive, and intimidating.



I am psychologically programmed to suck at parenthood. However, due to my experience it

just might be the other way around.

quote:

Originally posted by Miss Pie Did you not know immediately that you had made a mistake? Because you can get the morning after pill over the counter, you know. How the fuck can people be this fucking stupid? And now you're going to give the world another fucking moron for the rest of us to clean up after. Thanks a lot.

Yes. As soon as I finished, I knew I made a mistake. I started praying almost instantly.

Are you for real?

Nobody is ever ready. But that's ok, because in some sense, everyone is just as ready as they're ever going to be. The only thing you need to do to not fuck it up is to be there.

And sacrifice everything, yeah, you gotta do that, too.

Mazel tov!

I have been with this girl for 4 months. She clearly stated that she is on the pill. I clearly stated that I don't like condoms.

Wait, is she actually confirmed pregnant, or did you just dribble your putrid load into her?

Confirmed. Parents don't know yet, however.

You can make a homemade Redneck abortion. You'll need some Jager and a wood mallet...

Where's Mattinsanity when you need him.