quote:

Originally posted by Spacey Orange Dear Cousin, I have always longed that you tear my dress apart, fiber by fiber, and do things to me only a whore would allow.

Whoa... that's a hot thing to say.

But the guy is in his forties, mate, he'd die of excessive excitement

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simply write about the fact that you don't know him a lot, but wish you did , if that is indeed true; If not, lie.

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201

quote:

Originally posted by Ygrene Just write: 'Lordy, Lordy look who's forty! ZING!' Good to go!

lol, you were a hallmark card writer in a previous life, weren't you?

This reminds me of back in high school, when someone asked me to write on there year book. Id always be like "wtf" in my head.

I dont even know you.

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Write this to him, verbatim:

"Hi (Insert Name),

It's a pleasure having you in my family. However, due to the fact that I haven't taken the time to get to know you and have been obligated to write you this letter by other family members, I have sought the help of an internet forum to express my thoughts and memories of you. I hope this letter means as much to you as you have meant to me.

Love,

T"

I had the liberty of writing this rough draft out for you, T.

I hope it helps.



Hey 40 Year Old Cousin,

I hope you don’t think that I’m some kind of weird, four eyed fool for writing this letter. Actually it may be a little ironic for me to write one….since we did meet for the first time through note writing…lol Anyway your probably wondering why I’m even writing this letter. Well, first off…I’m bored and I should be studying for finals. Second I wanted to tell you something. I think you’re a cool and very cute girl. Actually I think you’re the shit (as these young kids like to say these days). As the great Patrick Aksan used to say and I quote: “If I were a fly, Id be all over you cuz you’re the shit.” Maybe it’s your sexy nose ring, or you’re coming into class late asking if there was a quiz. Or maybe it’s just the fact that I’m soooooooooo lonely and I need a friend (ha ha that was a joke….no really it was And maybe I’m just ignorant or can’t take a hint but you never did answer my emails that I sent waaaaaaaaaaay back when. You know…..the ones that asked for your hand in marriage…or the one asking if you wanted to go to Hawaii on my yacht…...or maybe you didn’t get those. Hmmm well, if you didn’t at least I know that you got this letter.

40 Year Old Cousin, I have a question for you. I was wondering if you’d like to have a nice romantic dinner at McDonald’s with me this weekend? (I’m messing with you. It should be on Friday cuz they have better deals during the weekdays) But in all seriousness. Would you like to go out with me? Maybe go dancing or take a nice walk on the beach. Id like to get to know you. See what makes this East coast babe tick. Grant it… I’m not the sexiest guy, or the strongest, or even the hungest….. Fuck it…I’m as plain as a bagel that you sell at your store. But I can promise you one thing. You’ll have a fun night out. Man I sound like a damn advertisement…..see I even have a little marketing skills to offer you. So what do ya say Ashley? Will you do the honor of going out on a date with me? It took me 11 weeks to nurse the balls to be able to ask you….. and if you say no. It’s ok. Ill have another 12 weeks in Accounting 300 to write you a better letter/proposal.

I hope you enjoyed reading this letter as much as I enjoyed writing it. I also hope that you don’t have a boyfriend cuz I’m sure he’d REALLY enjoy reading this letter. And the fact that I just spent study time making an (_,_) out of myself really doesn’t help. I hope to hear from you soon babe (hopefully sooner than later). My cell phone number is 613 323 XXX XXXX and my email is zomigrepost@yahoo.com Hopefully if all goes well we will be talking soon. If not than I wish you a great 10 days off from school and Ill be awaiting the very awkward moment between us in Accounting 300. (I’m just kidding) Have a great break!!!
Yours truly,
Theresa

i wouldn't make fun of the age.

40 seems to be the mid-life crisis focal point.

quote:

Originally posted by VAR i wouldn't make fun of the age. 40 seems to be the mid-life crisis focal point.

Shit!

That is totally what I was going for.

Lira, do I have permission to steal what you wrote?

Yan, I proper lolled. Totally appropriate given the thread title.

UWM, it's true, and sad. Haha!

quote:

Originally posted by Yan I had the liberty of writing this rough draft out for you, T. I hope it helps. Hey 40 Year Old Cousin, I hope you don’t think that I’m some kind of weird, four eyed fool for writing this letter. Actually it may be a little ironic for me to write one….since we did meet for the first time through note writing…lol Anyway your probably wondering why I’m even writing this letter. Well, first off…I’m bored and I should be studying for finals. Second I wanted to tell you something. I think you’re a cool and very cute girl. Actually I think you’re the shit (as these young kids like to say these days). As the great Patrick Aksan used to say and I quote: “If I were a fly, Id be all over you cuz you’re the shit.” Maybe it’s your sexy nose ring, or you’re coming into class late asking if there was a quiz. Or maybe it’s just the fact that I’m soooooooooo lonely and I need a friend (ha ha that was a joke….no really it was And maybe I’m just ignorant or can’t take a hint but you never did answer my emails that I sent waaaaaaaaaaay back when. You know…..the ones that asked for your hand in marriage…or the one asking if you wanted to go to Hawaii on my yacht…...or maybe you didn’t get those. Hmmm well, if you didn’t at least I know that you got this letter. 40 Year Old Cousin, I have a question for you. I was wondering if you’d like to have a nice romantic dinner at McDonald’s with me this weekend? (I’m messing with you. It should be on Friday cuz they have better deals during the weekdays) But in all seriousness. Would you like to go out with me? Maybe go dancing or take a nice walk on the beach. Id like to get to know you. See what makes this East coast babe tick. Grant it… I’m not the sexiest guy, or the strongest, or even the hungest….. Fuck it…I’m as plain as a bagel that you sell at your store. But I can promise you one thing. You’ll have a fun night out. Man I sound like a damn advertisement…..see I even have a little marketing skills to offer you. So what do ya say Ashley? Will you do the honor of going out on a date with me? It took me 11 weeks to nurse the balls to be able to ask you….. and if you say no. It’s ok. Ill have another 12 weeks in Accounting 300 to write you a better letter/proposal. I hope you enjoyed reading this letter as much as I enjoyed writing it. I also hope that you don’t have a boyfriend cuz I’m sure he’d REALLY enjoy reading this letter. And the fact that I just spent study time making an (_,_) out of myself really doesn’t help. I hope to hear from you soon babe (hopefully sooner than later). My cell phone number is 613 323 XXX XXXX and my email is zomigrepost@yahoo.com Hopefully if all goes well we will be talking soon. If not than I wish you a great 10 days off from school and Ill be awaiting the very awkward moment between us in Accounting 300. (I’m just kidding) Have a great break!!! Yours truly, Theresa

WINNAR! Hmm that was a pretty funny thread.

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quote:

Originally posted by UWM Write this to him, verbatim: "Hi (Insert Name), It's a pleasure having you in my family. However, due to the fact that I haven't taken the time to get to know you and have been obligated to write you this letter by other family members, I have sought the help of an internet forum to express my thoughts and memories of you. I hope this letter means as much to you as you have meant to me. Love, T"

Definitely the best option.

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life begins at 40, so better start enjoying it

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quote:

[11:58] Bas //: fuck he's hot