it helps if you go to MIT, though.

That's not the first time you talk about it, Brian.

Did someone tell you you'd win a Nobel Prize and you're now feeling hopeless because things are not working out?

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quote:

Originally posted by Lira Why?

from my experience through teaching them generally they don't have a choice to believe they can be the best due to everything others have invested in them.

vote steve aoki dj mag top 100
xo

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quote:

Originally posted by Lira That's not the first time you talk about it, Brian. Did someone tell you you'd win a Nobel Prize and you're now feeling hopeless because things are not working out?

LOL. Nah, but I was very delusional about my abilities as a young kid and a teen, and I think that my upbringing helped those delusions grow. Only in college did I fully realize that my hazy dreams of glory weren't going to work out.

School is a place to keep kids busy so adults can get shit done during the day. Other than that it is up to the individual to realize their own goals.

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quote:

Originally posted by Lira Actually, the problem is that we're comparing people (i.e. that a really smart person is smart because (s)he's smarter than most people). People should learn that, there's a difference in doing something in order to stand out and doing something that may be outstanding. I love a quote by Banksy that says something like "Do you go to the restaurant so you can take a shit later? No, you go there for the food. It's stupid to do something for the sake of getting famous.

I like that and agree. I think it might be this that I am having the hardest time with:

quote:

Originally posted by MrJiveBoJingles Instead they should be learning how to make concrete plans for their futures and learning that any big dreamy plans they have for themselves will probably have to be scrapped if they're to achieve anything resembling contentment -- and that this relinquishing of grandiose fantasies is best done earlier rather than later.

What if contentment IS that big dreamy plan? I think that mirrors what you said, Lira.

I think more important than teaching a child that they probably can't do something great, would be to teach them to recognize when they can't do something great.

Here's a prayer I like, even though I am not religious:

God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change,
The courage to change the things I can,
And the wisdom to know the difference.

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quote:

Originally posted by Dervish "good enough"

This can be a very bad attitude, especially if you're raised that way from a young age. One of my earliest memories from school in the US (I came to NYC when I was 8) is a group "coloring" project in second grade (yea, most second graders here don't know their multiplication tables but they give them coloring projects). I was meticulously coloring within the lines, making sure the color was solid and consistent,etc while another kid was coloring on the other side of the same shape, and pretty much just scribbling all over the page with a fat marker. Naturally I was not happy and told the kid he's doing it wrong. The response: "eh it's good enough"

quote:

Originally posted by Ygrene I think more important than teaching a child that they probably can't do something great, would be to teach them to recognize when they can't do something great.

Good point. My first post was a bit extreme. What I really want to say is something like this:

Schools and many parents today encourage kids to be hazy dreamers rather than setting out concrete plans for success in life. They need to know that any exceptional achievement will require both a good deal of talent and a lot of hard work -- hard work not on the order of writing a three-page paper for science class or running a couple miles in PE, which is what young kids think of as "hard work," but on the order of years of single-minded devotion to a problem or a field with hours of study or work being done each day. They need to know that if they want admiration outside the walls of their own home, then they will have to earn it, that any great amount of esteem will probably be very difficult to earn, and that people will only scoff at those who who have no evidence of achievement and yet expect others to recognize their greatness or brilliance.

And lastly they should know that people who make hazy dreaming their main pastime will get left in the dust and likely end up with a quite dissatisfying life unless they change their behavior or make some real plans.

Shouldn't it be up to parents to pass on work ethic to their children?

___________________
I've never been able to eat a whole baby.
Kill the women. Eat the children.
It's just one of those days where you want to bend over everyone you know and kiss their ass goodbye with a big sideways boot.

Latest Mix

My parents used to make that prayer every week, during our religious meetings... it's one of the very few things I liked about it

quote:

Originally posted by MrJiveBoJingles LOL. Nah, but I was very delusional about my abilities as a young kid and a teen, and I think that my upbringing helped those delusions grow. Only in college did I fully realize that my hazy dreams of glory weren't going to work out.

Well, but you're a smart guy, it probably should get you somewhere, unless you lack the will power. You may not feel like you're Julius Caesar, and you may feel you're being worshipped how Wittgenstein was in his life. Or like Soros, I don't know who you look up to.

But you may achieve something.

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quote:

Originally posted by Zild Shouldn't it be up to parents to pass on work ethic to their children?

Sure, but very often they fail in that.

quote:

Originally posted by MrJiveBoJingles Good point. My first post was a bit extreme. What I really want to say is something like this: Schools and many parents today encourage kids to be hazy dreamers rather than setting out concrete plans for success in life. They need to know that any exceptional achievement will require both a good deal of talent and a lot of hard work -- hard work not on the order of writing a three-page paper for science class or running a couple miles in PE, which is what young kids think of as "hard work," but on the order of years of single-minded devotion to a problem or a field with hours of study or work being done each day. They need to know that if they want admiration outside the walls of their own home, then they will have to earn it, that any great amount of esteem will probably be very difficult to earn, and that people will only scoff at those who who have no evidence of achievement and yet expect others to recognize their greatness or brilliance. And lastly they should know that people who make hazy dreaming their main pastime will get left in the dust and likely end up with a quite dissatisfying life unless they change their behavior or make some real plans.

^5

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