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Spice Girls
| quote: | Originally posted by Maaz
But they allowed me to choose something else:
A curious fact about the spice girls is that every girl wants to be them and every boy wants to do them  |
I do not want to be any Spice Girl. I hated them when they were 'in,' I hate them even more now that they're 'out.'
 You should see the theory I wrote on how I think the spice girls disappeared. Did anyone else notice that? They faded away into the oblivion of stars who suck.
Here's mah theory:
My Theory Of What Happened To The Spice Girls
WARNING: The following theory probably makes absolutely no sense whatsoever, but here it is anyways. Just in case you're allergic to insanity, don't read this as it may subsequently be hazardous to your health:
First of all, after their famous debut in the Pop culture, they decided it sucked because nobody liked them anymore. So, they met a magical pink deer who was evil and had a plot to take over the world. He wanted Scary Spice as his love slave, but she somewhat kicked his ass which is invariably almost impossible for all the Spice Girls combined, but she did it anyways.
As the deer lay twitching and convulsing on the groud, the girls decided to make a trash-movie. Since the title "White Trash Bitch Spice Movie" Was inappropriate for the mobs of screaming eight year old girls and the mobs of screaming eighty-five year old men they had as their fans, they had to just call it "Spice World."
As Gerri was recovering from the massive crack addiction she had that had made her hallucinate enough to join the Spice Girls in the first place, she bagged out with her millions of dollars and left the others to flounder.
Meanwhile, Baby Spice and Barney were getting it on in the Spice-Mobile or whatever they call it when Barney, in a fit of ecstacy, revealed his evil plot to take over the world to Baby Spice. She agreed to be his love slave and was never heard from/seen of again, thank God. That eliminates one of them.
Scary Spice woke up one morning and walked up to her mirror in the bathroom. She looked up, and subsequently died of a heart attack due to the horrendous style of hair she had chosen, all ruffled it it's bedhead form. Oh no.
Posh Spice became the disciple of Yoko Ono, and decided to find someone exactly like John Lennon, but unfortunately just before he was to propose, he was shot by a nobody who wanted attention. Posh killed herself after unleashing a plague upon the world, in the form of her cybernetic clone. Who knows what the robot will do when the right day comes? All we can do is hold our breath and try to save ourselves from the twinky/preppy/popular role model of all of they psychos you see at the various Elementary and High School. There may be an underlying plot that these twinks are her minions.
Sporty got killed by a spandex shirt that was so tight that it collapsed both her lungs at once. She had so many Adidas clothes manufactured by highy talented babies in China, that the whole world could own one pair of Adidas pants for free. But the bitch left them all to Justin Timberlake, who wears them when he does ballet in secret.
THESIS OF THE END OF THE SPICE GIRLS. IT IS TRUE, SIMPLY BECAUSE IT I SAY IT IS, AND I AM GOD. ESS. GODDESS. YES. SO, FUCK THE SPICE GIRLS, AND ALL OF THEIR VICIOUS TWINKY KIND. THANK-YOU.
^ Was originally posted in the Winamp forums.
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I saw an interview with her on CNN and it was very weird because she showed herself as an ordinary shy girl (not punk whatsoever... she also admitted that the punk attitude is purely commercial 
