note how i put enjoy in a whole new msg rather than editing the original... true post whore status.

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hey ive just thought of a wicked game! we just say one word
and you reply with just one word
il start it off

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haha
i was right, this book sucks.

V. The First Date

When. Always go for a weeknight; Thursday is best. Most women will let go and stay out later on Thursdays then they will on other nights. This is due to a widely held belief that there is only one more day of work left and that one can make it on less sleep and more booze. I also prefer weeknights, because if you are having fun you can stay out late with her. If it sucks you can always say “I’ve got a big meeting in the morning and have to get up early.” You can easily bail by 9 PM if she turns out to be a skank or a bitch.

Have her meet you at 7 PM: that way she will have eaten already. Chicks are always uncomfortable eating in front of guys they’ve just met. Never take her out to dinner until at least the third date.

Where. Have her meet you in a cool, funky bar that is not too loud. Never pick her up. Have her meet you there. This way she’ll feel more comfortable having her own car; and you can also make an easy escape if necessary. Pick a table or corner of the bar where you can sit close to her. Avoid big booths; they make it hard to touch her.

How. There are several basics that every dude should follow on the first date:
1. Keep Em Drinking
2. Don’t Say Anything Stupid
3. Make Em Laugh
4. Touch Them Once In a While (use to emphasize a joke or point). This will show her that you are interested in her and break the ice.
I also like to buy them a shot to loosen them up for the first kiss. The easiest way to accomplish this is to wait until they go to the bathroom and order it while they’re gone. That way they can’t object. I recommend ordering something sweet and with a kick: Layered B-52’s are money, baby!

The First Kiss. This is where most dudes blow it. Never, ever wait until you get to the car or (God Forbid) you have driven her home! Kissing on doorsteps is an urban legend that only works in the movies. Instead, try the surprise attack. Once you leave the bar just grab em and kiss em. Simple, but effective. Try brushing your lips against the corner of her mouth and then pull her close and slowly kiss her. Do not, I repeat, Do not grab any ass yet.

If the surprise attack works you should break it off first. I recommend no more than 30 seconds. Then as you walk her back to her car she’s feeling pretty good about it and you can have another makeout session or two along the way. When you get to her car pull her waist close to you and give her a long passionate kiss. You stop it first, say good night and walk away. Don’t tell her you had a good time, and definitely don’t tell her you’ll call her….just walk away. It’ll keep her wondering ‘til you call …chicks like to wonder….it’s romantic and titillating for them.

The Second Date. This time, you can pick her up. I prefer to try to get a little love at the door to break the ice. At least give her a hug and kiss on the neck here. She’ll think you’re happy to see her…they always let you, so go for it.

You can do whatever you want for the evening. I like to take her to a bar then club dancing: chicks love to dance. You could also take her to a bar and then dinner if you want. I would avoid movies at all cost; they tend to put you both to sleep. You could also cook dinner for her at your house. In any case, your goal is to get her back to your place, or hers if she wants. Don’t wait until you are ready to go home; instead, ask her early. Say “I have a really nice bottle of wine at my place…why don’t we go over there and have a glass of wine, and then I can bring you home in an hour or so.”

Once she is on your turf, she’ll be putty in your hands. An advanced technique guaranteed to speed up your time to the promise land is what I call the saving myself line. It’s quite simple. When you’re making out on the couch or wherever, try telling her (with a strait face) that you never sleep with women unless you’ve been dating them for at least a month. Then shut up!. This will process through her mind for a while and then she’ll become the aggressor. Chicks love a challenge. Four out of five times she’ll jump your bones that night.

Who Pays & When
The rules are as follows: You are the guy, so you pay 100% for the first month of any relationship. I know this sounds like bullshit, but its part of the game. Then, and only then, do you let her start carrying her own weight. Don’t fall into the offer to pay trap. A good woman will offer to pay or possibly go Dutch on the check. Don’t let her under any circumstances. She’ll talk it over with her friends and they’ll decide you are cheap. You’ll never get any lovin.

After you’ve been sleeping with her on a regular basis you can start letting her pay. A good benchmark is to compare salaries (you might not know hers, but you can probably guess). If she makes half of what you do, then you should probably play the sugar daddy role and suck it up most of the time.

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Peace 'n Love! • Mikey • Sydney, Australia.

batman

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VI. How To Impress A Chick

Manners
· Always thank a woman who buys you something, no matter how trivial
· Never thank a woman for sex
· Always open the car door for the woman on the first few dates, then forget about it. Any chick who expects you to open her door is a bitch..dump her.
· Farting & burping. Don’t’ ever do it: it’s a real chick turnoff. Hold it until it comes out slowly and silently. If you’re really gonna drop ass—go outside or walk at least 20 feet away first.

Impress Her With Your Culinary Skills. A sure fire way to impress a chick is to make her dinner. She will think you are the greatest and talk of you incessantly to her girlfriends.

Atmosphere.

Lighting. Place candles strategically throughout the house to provide romantic lighting. Chicks dig candles.
Music. Soft rock, jazz are best. I love Metallica and White Zombie, but when I’m mac’n on some babe I always go for the Cat Stevens, David Sanborn, or Simply Red. Always put the CD player on repeat. There is nothing worse than the music ending in the middle of a makeout session.
Food. Always prepare the meal beforehand. The more time you have to spend in the kitchen, the less love you’ll get. Go with a nice salad and something you can bake that will last a while if you flip it on warm. Steaks are bad..they’ll just burn if you’re successfully making out on the couch or preferably in the bedroom.

I also like to put out some brie and crackers and/or shrimp and cocktail sauce. She’ll think you’re classy and you can both sit on the couch and drink and eat something immediately. Chicks get grouchy if they’re really hungry, and its probably after 7:30 by now. By snacking, you also put something into your stomach so that you’re set for a couple of hours if you successfully negotiate the tour of the apartment/bed tackle discussed in the next section.

Warning: Try not to look like a player. If she thinks you do this on a regular basis, then you’re done. Tell her “I love to cook, but never get a chance.”

Tour of the Apartment/Bed Tackle
After you’ve settled everything in the kitchen and had two or three glasses of wine you can attempt the Tour Move. This is a simple move—you simply say “dinner won’t be ready for a little bit, let me give you a tour of my mammoth estate.” Once you get to your room you start a surprise makeout session followed by a sudden loss of balance which somehow results in both of you ending up falling on the bed. The rest is up to you, but before you try this move be sure of the following:
· CD player must be on repeat
· Food should be on warm or it will burn
· Oven timer should be off or it will undoubtedly go off right in the middle of your game.

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Peace 'n Love! • Mikey • Sydney, Australia.

lameeeee.

quote:

Originally posted by Trancey Ash OMG Reliving the Goa Mix experience! This has to be the best Essential Mix of all time! Why can;t DJs be creative like this anymore! Fookin amazin!

ahhh
excellent choice!


goa=ownage



get the "a voyage into trance" cds!
i have a double cd called volume 1, it has the oakey mix and the danny rampling mix
its gold!

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new set online, Summer Journeys

quote:

Originally posted by Jah batman

He lives in a lair

Wayne Manor



post jah!

VII. Sex Tips

A wise man once said “Sex is like Pizza. Even when its bad, its still pretty good.”

Condom Use. The use of condoms is highly recommended. I know it’s a drag, but..well you know all that.
Where to Keep Them. I recommend that you keep condoms EVERYWHERE. And always keep at least 4 together. What the hell good is one condom….you’re gonna need at least two for the night, and one for the morning and you’ll probably wreck at least one trying to get it on!

I highly recommend that you keep some on you at all times. I prefer to wear baggy pants with side pockets for storage. You might be saying “But Dude..what if she finds them in my pocket?” If a girl has her hand in your pocket, that means she’s already decided she wants you. That will just convince her even more. I also keep some in the car. This might be tough in warm climates, but I try to be mobile with my condoms. There is nothing worse than a surprise attack and not being prepared!

You should also put lots of condoms under your mattress. I separate them and place them strategically separated at approximately 4 –5 inches along the border. This makes for very easy access….just lean, grab, peel and you’re golden. You don’t ever want to have to say “wait here a minute.”

Cunnilingus. My motto is: Eat It All & They’ll Always Come Back For More.
Some things to remember:
1. Take your time. Explore and find our what she likes then make a mental note and practice, practice, practice.
2. Keep going till she gives you the tap or finishes writhing on the bed angrily shouting your name or that of her favorite deity.
If she’s had an orgasm then she’s exhausted. Now is the time to have it your way. Climb aboard and take care of business, boy!

Contrary to popular belief, the tap on the shoulder doesn’t necessarily mean you are doing something wrong. Most times she is just worried about taking too long to come or else she can’t ordinarily come that way. If you get the tap then I suggest you ask her to climb on top of you—9 out of 10 times she’ll make herself come fairly quickly. Then you can do the roll and end up on top of her to finish up.

Toys in the Bedroom. I highly recommend keeping lots of them around for diversity. Fur handcuffs are ok, but they tend to scratch up your bed frame. Instead I recommend plain old straps. If you’re in a pinch, neck ties work well. Always remember to recycle. By this I mean that if you plan ahead carefully you can use the same equipment with different women without looking like a player. What you do is carefully open the packaging (razor blade is best) by putting a thin slit in back and across. That way you can put them back in the packaging and show your next girl like you just went out and bought them for her.

What To Do If She Won’t Have Intercourse But Will Give You A Blowjob. This is what I call the Bill Clinton rationale…some woman have a totally warped view of sex; they see intercourse as more intimate than oral sex! I know this is totally whacked, but you will run across it every once in a while. If a woman won’t have intercourse with you but will give you either a handjob or a blowjob then 90% of the time she has a boyfriend. The other 10% are just freaks. If she’s part of the 90% that has a boyfriend, then play it cool and enjoy it! She’ll be having sex with you within 1-2 weeks. If she is part of the other 10% that thinks that somehow she is saving herself for that special someone…dump her.

Math Equations vs. Dead Puppies. Don’t forget: Hold Out, Hold Out, Hold Out!
Sometimes the only way to keep from blowin your load is to think of something less exciting than the gorgeous chick on top of you. I prefer to do multiplication tables in my head, but some guys like to think of dead animals. Do whatever works for you and never enjoy yourself until she is finished!

Winter Bush: If she doesn’t trim then offer to do it for her. If she won’t let you…dump her.

Anal Sex Most women won’t, but they still fantasize about it. I’ve yet to meet a woman who didn’t like a little action in and around the area. This is an especially useful technique if you use a little wet finger action during cunnilingus. You can also try the old “It Slipped” routine, but this requires you bust out some KY and do a little prep work. Often times they won’t stop you. I do suggest you have a vibrator handy to finish her off…the reach around is a very tricky move in these instances.

The Dude Fake Orgasm. Drugs and alcohol can often cause your Johnson to have more stamina then you. When this happens, don’t be afraid to pull the old fake orgasm. Be sure to make lots of noise…shouting, “I’m gonna come,” works well, but I’d also suggest lifting them off the bed and slowly coming to a stop.

By faking one, you give yourself the option of giving up for good or else resting for a few minutes and looking like a SuperStud! Just don’t pull out, and keep kissing her neck etc. After a few minutes of collecting your energy you can start (very, very slowly) to give the impression that you are getting aroused again. No woman will ever stop you unless its like the 3rd or 4th time of the night. If they do..dump em!

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Peace 'n Love! • Mikey • Sydney, Australia.

ive gotta be getting close to philby!

VIII. How To Dump Chicks

If you have to think about it, end it. If you are trying to figure it out, or if you’re having a tough time etc., then end it. Hanging with chicks should be fun, not work. Life is too short to hang out with chicks that bring you down.

Do it on the phone if possible. I know this sounds lame, and it probably is, but it is a hellova lot easier. Don'’ call them for two days, then they’ll call you once, then one day later they’ll call you again and give you the old “We Gotta Talk” line. We gotta talk really means we gotta breakup. Now its their idea, and you have an easy way out.

I also recommend you let her down easy by telling her “I really you, but I’m not in love with you, I know what love is and it’ll be best for both of us if we continue to look for it. Life is too short etc.” This works well, cause she has to agree with this…she’s a chick after all. Sometimes you will even get the old “Come over here one last time.” This is rare and spooky, but fun. Just make sure you tell someone where you are in case she’s really pissed off and chains you to the bed for a week.

How To Know If She’s Blowing You Off. The following are telltale signs:
· You’ve left two or more messages and she hasn’t returned a call.
· Her cell phone gets to the third ring. (everyone has Caller ID on their cell, she knows it’s you calling.)
· She says things like “I’m watching a movie/show, can I call you back?”
· She’s vague when you talk about what you did last night. She’ll say things like “I was out with a friend(s).”
· She cancels dates regularly with excuses like “I didn’t sleep well last night.” “I’m Tired,” or “I have to work late.”

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Peace 'n Love! • Mikey • Sydney, Australia.