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People do not change - they just get better or worse at hiding their true selves.
Doesn't that just totally justify your inklings towards hatred? lol
Perhaps you forgot to mention it in your original post, but have you actually tried talking with her about this? I know it sounds as though it's hard to get a hold of her anymore, but if you call her up one day and just say "we really need to talk in person - it's important" then she'd better find some time to allocate to you, even if only a few minutes. Tell her exactly how all of this feels. It is not going to be easy at all, so prepare yourself for whatever happens.
And at this point, don't hold on to the things she says - she loves you, she wants to marry you, forever-ness, etc... - it's easy to say these things to others whom you feel close to, but not actually have any eventual intentions of following through with them. Her actions are speaking much louder than words, even if it's an ugly thing to come to realize this.
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There are more things in heaven and earth, Horatio,
Than are dreamt of in your philosophy.
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