A bartender is sitting behind the bar on a typical day, when the door bursts open and in come four exuberant blondes.

They head up to the bar, order five bottles of champagne and ten glasses, take their order over and sit down at a large table. The corks are popped, the glasses are filled and they begin toasting and chanting, "51 days, 51 days, 51 days!"

Soon, three more blondes arrive, take up their drinks and the chanting grows, "51 days, 51 days, 51 days!"

Two more blondes show up and soon their voices join in raising the roof, "51 days, 51 days, 51 days!"

Finally, the tenth blonde comes in with a picture under her arm. She walks over to the table, sets the picture in the middle and the table erupts.

Up jump the others, they begin dancing around the table, exchanging high-fives, all the while chanting, "51 days, 51 days, 51 days!"

The bartender can't contain his curiosity any longer, so he walks over to the table. There in the center is a framed picture of the Cookie Monster. When the frenzy dies down a little bit, the bartender asks one of the blondes, "What's all the chanting and celebration about?"

The blonde who brought in the picture pipes up, "Everyone thinks that blondes are dumb and they make fun of us. So, we decided to set the record straight. Ten of us got together, bought this puzzle and put it together. The side of the box said 2-4 years, but we put it together in 51 days!

One morning, a stud farm owner receives a visit from a midget wanting to buy a horse. It soon becomes obvious that the dwarf has a bad speech impediment. ‘Can I view a female horth?’ he asks. Dutifully, the owner leads one out, and shows the midget the hoofs and legs. ‘That’th a thtrong looking beatht, for thure,’ says the gnomic breeder, nodding his head. ‘Can I thee her mouf?’ Confused as to how the tiny man will ride the animal, the farmer still picks up the midget by his braces and shows him the horse’s mouth. ‘Nith, healthy-looking horth,’ agrees the midget. ‘Now move me awownd to her eerth …’ Now getting annoyed, the owner lifts up the midget one more time to look at the ears. ‘Finally,’ says the Lilliputian, ‘can I see her twat?’ With that, the owner picks up the midget and shoves his head into the horse's vagina. He pulls him out after a minute, and the tiny man stumbles around, dazed. ‘Perhapth I thould rephrathe that,’ says the midget, shaking his head. ‘Can I thee her wun awownd?’

So it is judgment day, and god is deciding who goes to heaven and hell. First guy comes up and god says, "Of you're a good guy, go to heaven." Second guy comes up, "Oh you're bad, you go to hell." Third guy comes up, "Oh you're very very bad, you go back to Russia."

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Originally posted by bas Dual exhaust tips on dual exhaust = QUAD EXHAUST = 300 gain in horsepower. Duh

quote:

Originally posted by bas Undies with a dickhole aren't good for guys. Your balls can get caught in them. That's why I prefer to go over the gate instead of through the fence.

What's long, brown, and smells like shit?














































... a welfare line.

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HARD TEKNO

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Originally posted by elFreak knock knock whos there ania looks fat ania looks fat who dont woory iamesol would fuck her

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