quote:

Originally posted by floyd741 some dude: "hey man do you remember your first blowjob?" me: "lol yeah" that dude again: "how did it taste?" me: "wut" like 10 seconds later me: "oh wtf not cool man"

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i was trying to call someone a dumb idiot once when i was on E i think...

but i called him a dumbit. i use it a lot now.

I sat down at a table filled with Polish people. I asked them how they liked living in America after leaving their shithole called Poland. I then explained to them the reason why they had big heads was from the Russians putting nuclear waste in their water supply. That was this past saturday night. I feel very bad now since they are actually really nice people.

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quote:

Originally posted by floyd741 some dude: "hey man do you remember your first blowjob?" me: "lol yeah" that dude again: "how did it taste?" me: "wut" like 10 seconds later me: "oh wtf not cool man"

LOLWTF! I would have been like: "Ziiiiip *take cock out* - why don't you find out for yourself?"

Or you could have said: "Rancid, he didn't wash his cock after fucking my friend up the ass... shit and cum, you know?"

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If you were really f'd up how can you remember?

way, way, way too many ridiculous have happened to me while drunk. the most recent;

argued with a random girl at a club for about 10 minutes over nothing and then proceeded to hit on her, left the club and ran a couple of miles in the freezing cold wearing a skin tight t-shirt (while i had enough change to pay for the streetcar which passed by me about 10 times), stopped off at mcdonalds to refuel and continued my run until a friend finally found me with a cab only to realize we both didn't have enough money to pay. so as the cab dropped us off I found a jar of change at my place and paid the driver 30 dollars in quarters.

other than that i've done some incredibly stupid things; broke a mirror at my highschool dance with my fist (and bled all over the place til I was nauseous, was let off by a nice cop), gotten into various fights, black eye, swollen lip, chipped a tooth, fought a bouncer, kicked my friends car and dented it, peed on a car handle (the guy was an asshole), threw a bottle at a cab and and had 10 serbian taxi drivers after me, fought a dog (in serbia), had my foot run over by a car, found myself on the opposite side of the city multiple times, and some other unmentionables.


i'm a very sloppy drunk... trying to change that.

Last edited by RapidFire on Nov-24-2010 at 10:47

quote:

Originally posted by RapidFire way, way, way too many ridiculous have happened to me while drunk. the most recent; argued with a random girl at a club for about 10 minutes over nothing and then proceeded to hit on her, left the club and ran a couple of miles in the freezing cold wearing a skin tight t-shirt (while i had enough change to pay for the streetcar which passed by me about 10 times), stopped off at mcdonalds to refuel and continued my run until a friend finally found me with a cab only to realize we both didn't have enough money to pay. so as the cab dropped us off I found a jar of change at my place and paid the driver 30 dollars in quarters. other than that i've done some incredibly stupid things; broke a mirror at my highschool dance with my fist (and bled all over the place til I was nauseous, was let off by a nice cop), gotten into various fights, black eye, swollen lip, chipped a tooth, fought a bouncer, kicked my friends car and dented it, peed on a car handle (the guy was an asshole), threw a bottle at a cab and and had 10 serbian taxi drivers after me, fought a dog (in serbia), had my foot run over by a car, found myself on the opposite side of the city multiple times, and some other unmentionables. i'm a very sloppy drunk... trying to change that.

quote:

Originally posted by RapidFire (the guy was an asshole)

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Psychological_projection

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Wasn't me but this was the conversation between a buddy of mine and a campus safety officer a few years ago after the campus cop busted him for lying drunk outside the steps of my place during a house party:

Campus Safety: Who is the president of the United States?

Buddy: Why do I need to answer?

Officer: It's part of a sobriety test

Buddy: But you haven't even read me my rights yet.

Officer: Please answer the question

Buddy: George W. Bush

Officer: Thank you

Buddy: Now you tell me officer, who is the president of India?

Officer: Umm , I'm not sure

Buddy: So as per campus safety protocol, do i arrest you?

quote:

Originally posted by raveed Wasn't me but this was the conversation between a buddy of mine and a campus safety officer a few years ago after the campus cop busted him for lying drunk outside the steps of my place during a house party: Campus Safety: Who is the president of the United States? Buddy: Why do I need to answer? Officer: It's part of a sobriety test Buddy: But you haven't even read me my rights yet. Officer: Please answer the question Buddy: George W. Bush Officer: Thank you Buddy: Now you tell me officer, who is the president of India? Officer: Umm , I'm not sure Buddy: So as per campus safety protocol, do i arrest you?

Lol! Did he get arrested?

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wanna be my boyfriend to an ugly bitch at a club

quote:

Originally posted by Mattinsanity go insane because sane people are too scared to get their freak on. fuck the past. the past is the past. jesus will always love me and wants an intimate relationship.