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Slylee
love lockdown



Registered: May 2001
Location: Hollywood, FL

quote:
Originally posted by LiquidX
Now thats another topic all together. You are giving all thats yours to him to finance and control.. which I find perfectly find, if he has that ability to do that then why not, as longest there's understandment and logical thinking into each others minds.


that's pretty much the situation im in now. i'm very aware of my problems with money and i'm trying to fix it, but i dont completely trust myself just yet, so i'm fine with just letting my bf be in charge of mailing all the bills out and just sort of updating me on what's been paid, and how much i owe him (like he'll cut the check to cover it, and then i'll just give him money).

i prefer it that way because he's super organized and responsible and pays every single bill on time and he has great credit. and most importantly, i trust him.


___________________

My soliloquy may be hard for some to swallow, but so is cod liver oil.
quote:
Originally posted by notelfreak
man i can't believe i tried to come off as responsible in that other thread, i am so full of shit just don't tell anyone

Old Post Jul-17-2006 19:03 
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Ygrene
Dr. Stinkburger Deluxe



Registered: Nov 2003
Location: Totergefuttert

My wife and I have seperate checking, seperate savings, and a joint savings. It works ok for us because we both know what our responsibilities are, financially.


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Old Post Jul-17-2006 19:07  United States
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EarnYourKeep
LIT



Registered: Dec 2001
Location: twentyonetwo

I've sort of lived this rule with the amount of income I'm currently receiving and think it's fairly acceptable through out a shared lifestyle.

The only time I think it's necessary to share a bank account is when there is a share in responsibilities. Meaning, if you file for a loan (as a married couple), it should be signed by both the husband and the wife thus meaning we are both accountable for this loan. In any way shape or form, if both names are on the loan agreement, both parties are responsible for up to half of what is loaned. Same goes for a mortgage on a house, a stock market investment or any venture capital investments going forward.

At this time, the budgeting of money is ultra important. Even if I (or she) for that matter made a significant amount of money more than the other, I think a joint account would only prove it's usage for these responsibilities that we have both signed for.

Until then, I think keeping independant accounts is fair enough until the decision is made to sign for something in both names. At a later (less risk) date when say a marriage is complete with children, then we can discuss the distribution of finances that should help cover the cost of living expenses and future investments for your children. I'm a huge advocate of saving money for my children right off the bat, meaning at the age of 18, they will have access to money that has aged over the course of their lifetime. The interest rates are outstanding for nominal investments.


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JUST ME N YOU

Old Post Jul-17-2006 19:10 
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RandomGirl
Supreme tranceaddict



Registered: Jul 2003
Location:

I think all of the money should be put into one account. In my opinion, when you marry someone, you are essentially merging into one entity that is working toward the same end, and therefore, all of what you have, and all of what he has becomes the both of yours. Having seperate accounts insinuates that something belongs solely to one or the other of the couple, and that to me defeats the entire point of marriage.

Old Post Jul-17-2006 19:24 
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Nobody_Special
tranceaddict in training



Registered: Jan 2006
Location: Pembroke, Ontario

Joint accounts are very very very evil. Don't ask. Bad experiance.


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Old Post Jul-17-2006 19:54  Canada
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Ygrene
Dr. Stinkburger Deluxe



Registered: Nov 2003
Location: Totergefuttert

quote:
Originally posted by Theresa
I think all of the money should be put into one account. In my opinion, when you marry someone, you are essentially merging into one entity that is working toward the same end, and therefore, all of what you have, and all of what he has becomes the both of yours. Having seperate accounts insinuates that something belongs solely to one or the other of the couple, and that to me defeats the entire point of marriage.


I dunno, I think everyone has to find their own happy medium. I mean, if I was still buying records, would that be fair to make that purchase out of a joint bank account? Keep in mind that this expense is around $150/month and is nothing more than a hobby.

I know if my wife was buying Hallmark collectible figurines at the rate of $150/month out of *our* money, I'd be like WTF!!

Since we have separate checking, separate savings, and joint savings....as long as she fulfills her end of the joint account, I don't care what goes on in her individual accounts and vice versa (sometimes, lol)


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Old Post Jul-17-2006 20:02  United States
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RandomGirl
Supreme tranceaddict



Registered: Jul 2003
Location:

quote:
Originally posted by Ygrene
I dunno, I think everyone has to find their own happy medium. I mean, if I was still buying records, would that be fair to make that purchase out of a joint bank account? Keep in mind that this expense is around $150/month and is nothing more than a hobby.

I know if my wife was buying Hallmark collectible figurines at the rate of $150/month out of *our* money, I'd be like WTF!!

Since we have separate checking, separate savings, and joint savings....as long as she fulfills her end of the joint account, I don't care what goes on in her individual accounts and vice versa (sometimes, lol)


Meh. Either way, that $150/mth is being taken away from the collective money used for the both of you.

I think there should obviously be an allowance/mth, and all large purchases above that allowance need to be mutually decided upon. You work for the both of you, not just for yourself. Therefore, the money coming in should be equally available to either partner.

Old Post Jul-17-2006 20:07 
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Ygrene
Dr. Stinkburger Deluxe



Registered: Nov 2003
Location: Totergefuttert

quote:
Originally posted by Theresa
Meh. Either way, that $150/mth is being taken away from the collective money used for the both of you.

I think there should obviously be an allowance/mth, and all large purchases above that allowance need to be mutually decided upon. You work for the both of you, not just for yourself. Therefore, the money coming in should be equally available to either partner.


Agreed. Let's get married.


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Old Post Jul-17-2006 20:10  United States
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RandomGirl
Supreme tranceaddict



Registered: Jul 2003
Location:

quote:
Originally posted by Ygrene
Agreed. Let's get married.



*insert giddy school girl emoticon here*

O0o0o0o0o0ohhh!! Yay!!!

Ms. Theresa Ygrene

Has a nice ring to it

Old Post Jul-17-2006 20:20 
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noikeee
dubstep convert



Registered: Apr 2002
Location: lost and wandering looking for directions.

personally, me and my right hand share the same bank accounts.

Old Post Jul-17-2006 20:28  Portugal
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shaw
RIP



Registered: Jan 2005
Location: Intergalactic Mimosa Station

A: It depends on whether both people are working paying jobs.
B: Make 1 account.
C: Whoever is better at handling all of it, just by skill set alone, takes care of the finances. Keep each other informed (especially for investments), but the paying/budget-setting isn't going to go to the college dropout instead of the Finance major, just because he's male, or just so she can establish equality. That's silly.
D. If both people have jobs, get 1 account and treat the contributions as equal. Whoever makes more makes more. Doesn't get rid of the incentive to make more, but can account for other, non-monetary contributions.


...I'd still want a pre-nup, though. I don't want the decision to stay with someone to have to be based on convenience or financial consequences.


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Old Post Jul-17-2006 20:33 
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Zewad
This is my custom status.



Registered: Nov 2002
Location: Earth

i think every angle on this topic has been covered... so ill just repeat what has been said but in my own way...


quote:
Originally posted by Temperate
Seperate accounts are much better, because you never know if you will seperate or divorce.


slylee was right in it being a pessimistic attitude, but one cant be blinded by love... you have to open your eyes and realize what can happen to you if you dont have some sort of individuality

ygrene and all the wise time he's had being married... all of a few months seems to have the best plan with the joint account for all things that need to be paid to sustain life ie. bills, joint savings for the couple and/or future kids or whatever, etc. that is a set amt that you both agree on....and then your own personal account that is whatever is leftover from what you earn to spend korean hookers or garbage pail kids or whatever...

but each relationship is different and has different needs... slylee needs it to be joint so she can have an allowanace.... mrs. ygrene needs her account to by little halmark figurines...

there is no simple answer... the correct answer is what works for you and your spouse..


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Old Post Jul-17-2006 20:37  United States
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