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Originally posted by david.michael I'm preparing to defecate as we speak. Unfortunately, I cannot provide visual stimuli due to losing the micro-SD card from my camera-phone. However, I will rush back upon completion and describe the loaf with all due haste. I will try not to leave you all in suspense for too long.

It's been 20 minutes already... I hope you're okay!

Is it just me, or when you drop a big load that causes a splash, the water always splashes right on to your anus! Makes me giggle every time.

Alright, I'm back. Here are the results.

This dump was fairly standard. I went downstairs, which is where my "bathroom of choice" is located here at work. This bathroom is fairly ignored from a business standpoint (not a maintenance standpoint), so it is the one I prefer to use. However, as such, this particular stall does not have the pre-made paper ass-gaskets to prevent you from getting elFreak's crabAIDS. So, as is procedure, I began making a nest out of toilet paper to sit on. This room is fairly cold, so this also provides the added bonus of not placing my cheeks directly against the cold plastic seat.

The loaf itself was what I would describe as "standard size". Nothing to write home about/call your buddy over for, but more than a few mere Milk Duds. Just a solid turd between 6 - 9 inches in length (the curvature of the porcelain bowl can make for some inaccuracy in measurement estimation). The turd came out easily (but not too easily... the best shits are the ones which put you just before the threshold of pain before coming out, allowing for maximum relief/pleasure without an unbearable amount of suffering), though this was one of those that must've left behind what I call a Klingon. This is one of those sessions where it seems like you are going to have to wipe forever and there is always something on the paper each time. Eventually, you just have to give up, realizing that it's "good enough". Due to the increased paper consumption, though, it bumped this up to a "double-flusher", even though the turd itself was technically only single-flush-worthy.

There was a bit of a complication... I barely grazed my hand during the wiping procedure, painting my hand a bit with the poo. Not a huge deal, a quick trip to the sink fixed that. It was really quite minor and barely noticable, but worth mentioning.

All-in-all, I give it a solid 3/5. (Would have been a 3.5/5 had it not been for the slight mishap at the end.)

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Originally posted by JD8180 It's been 20 minutes already... I hope you're okay!

Sorry for the delay... and no worries, I'm fine. It merely took me a moment to make the post. I wanted to make sure to provide detail.

all u guys who enjoy the feeling of shitting should really try a finger in the ass i mean if ur girl is down lol

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My soliloquy may be hard for some to swallow, but so is cod liver oil.

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Originally posted by notelfreak man i can't believe i tried to come off as responsible in that other thread, i am so full of shit just don't tell anyone

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Originally posted by Slylee all u guys who enjoy the feeling of shitting should really try a finger in the ass i mean if ur girl is down lol

someone said in the cheaters thread that u give workshops on those...

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Originally posted by fayraree someone said in the cheaters thread that u give workshops on those...

lol

no but i aint scurred to do that if my man likes it. i think it's kinda hot

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My soliloquy may be hard for some to swallow, but so is cod liver oil.

quote:

Originally posted by notelfreak man i can't believe i tried to come off as responsible in that other thread, i am so full of shit just don't tell anyone

I shat a 12 incher once...I had a picture of it next to a ruler but I lost it

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My Set Archive - MY BLOG

u mean u lost ur ruler in that piece of shit?

No, I lost the picture, lol

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My Set Archive - MY BLOG

quote:

Originally posted by elFreak I can shit out a meatloaf sized bomb in 2 seconds flat. I just push until my eyes bug out of my head and don't look back. No time to read.

That's impressive. It would be more impressive if you can shit like a cannon though. Just point your ass out to someone and shit a bomb and knock someone out. Handy skill to have.