All i have to say is.....

you have the money

you have the wife that you love with your baby inside of her....

you have stability, and the maturity...



not ready?
when is someone ready?
even if they PLAN on having a first baby no one person is sure of how its going to turn out, of how its going to be.


dude- that kid of yours could be the best thing that has ever happened to the both of you

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kidnap her..u must

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Originally posted by DiMethGuy this really just pisses me off for some reason. a woman whom u love with all your heart and soul. you are doing the honorable thing. you have a good job, a house, and are married, then come to kids. how many people knock up chicks and leave. she should be grateful you are so committed and are doing everything right. like amber said tho i don't see how you can recover. you just found out what kind of woman she really is. obvious not the one who you think you married.

unfortunately, dimethguy is right. i understand the reasons for not wanting to have the child and all, but it seems that enferno's wife wasn't ready for marriage in the first place, not just for having a baby and she's doesn't seem to be handling the situation maturely, at least from what enferno told us.

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Originally posted by Mr. Pink All i have to say is..... you have the money you have the wife that you love with your baby inside of her.... you have stability, and the maturity... not ready? when is someone ready? even if they PLAN on having a first baby no one person is sure of how its going to turn out, of how its going to be. dude- that kid of yours could be the best thing that has ever happened to the both of you

beautiful post.... seriously.

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Disco and classical had sex while watching a sci-fi movie. Their child: trance.

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Originally posted by whiskers unfortunately, dimethguy is right. i understand the reasons for not wanting to have the child and all, but it seems that enferno's wife wasn't ready for marriage in the first place, not just for having a baby and she's doesn't seem to be handling the situation maturely, at least from what enferno told us.

I thought you were gone forever...

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Nathan Fake - Outhouse (Valentino Kanzyani Remix) || ID PLZ! PVD ID!!!
Disco and classical had sex while watching a sci-fi movie. Their child: trance.

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Originally posted by trancebrat Welcome to the wonderful world of COR. How is it any different than 1/2 of the other threads posted on COR? At least his involves something that makes people think/react. Some poor 15 year old asking how to make Miss Beautiful fall in love with him fails to stimulate my fingers enough to post a response. I think he is just needing to vent and it is easier to vent to strangers than it is to talk to people that would be directly involved. Friends and family are biased. If you don't like reading about his personal life just move on to the next thread.

You're missing the point. It's not that it's a shit thread (it was interesting enough to read - better than usual for the COR), it's that his attitude towards the whole situation is so overwhelmingly egocentric that I can't really believe he's ready for parenthood.

He's free to vent about whatever problems he feels like he's experiencing here, but it's also an invitation to feedback. My opinion is that he's being a bit of an asshole to his wife and from what I can tell she's probably correct in her assessment anyway, so I made my feelings on the matter pretty clear. That's what you get when you throw your personal life onto the internet. Not everyone's going to agree with you. If he's 1/100th of the way to being mature enough to raise a child, then I don't think he'll have a problem handling that.

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Originally posted by DiMethGuy time for a paternal rights revolution. starting with the repeal of roe v. wade.

thats just idiotic, a male should have a say in whether or not there should be a baby, but to take away the right of the mother to legally have abortions is the wrong way to go about it.

I've known women who were impregnated because they had jealous boyfriends prick the condoms, which lead to the pregnancy. and by taking away a womans right to decide whether or not they want the baby is wrong, especially if she had taken precautions not to get pregnant in the first place.

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Originally posted by Arbiter You're missing the point. It's not that it's a shit thread (it was interesting enough to read - better than usual for the COR), it's that his attitude towards the whole situation is so overwhelmingly egocentric that I can't really believe he's ready for parenthood. He's free to vent about whatever problems he feels like he's experiencing here, but it's also an invitation to feedback. My opinion is that he's being a bit of an asshole to his wife and from what I can tell she's probably correct in her assessment anyway, so I made my feelings on the matter pretty clear. That's what you get when you throw your personal life onto the internet. Not everyone's going to agree with you. If he's 1/100th of the way to being mature enough to raise a child, then I don't think he'll have a problem handling that.

I do agree about the invitation for feedback. I don't think his attitude is that bad. He is hurt and upset. I've never been in his shoes (and never will be) so I have no idea how I would react. I know I wouldn't post it on the internet, but to each their own. I would say that almost everyone has done something without thinking and later regreted it.

No one was there when they talked so we don't know what transpired between them. Maybe he was an asshole to her. I would think if he was it would have been after she advised that she wanted to have an abortion. If she thought he was an asshole and didn't want to be with him I'm sure she could have saved them both the trouble of all of this by having already left him before she got pregnant.

Just because you vent to strangers doesn't mean those are the exact words and tone you would use with your spouse. It truly sounds like there is more going than maybe he is even aware of.

i have a friend that is a doctor, and had my wife go to him today. they got a dna test done on the fetus, and it is mine.

now she is really pissed at me for not believing her that it is my kid.

still lost as to why she would do this

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Originally posted by enferno i have a friend that is a doctor, and had my wife go to him today. they got a dna test done on the fetus, and it is mine. now she is really pissed at me for not believing her that it is my kid. still lost as to why she would do this

Now this wasn't a good thing to do/happen at all.



By the way, I still think that, if it were for anyone here to chose, it should be the baby. Since (s)he's unable to answer, give the child the benefit of the doubt. Killing is wrong in most cases.

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Originally posted by trancebrat It isn't like he has the ultimate decision because obviously he doesn't. She could just leave him and go have an abortion. I am a woman and I still think that is fucked up. I have seen it happen to a male friend of mine. He was so devastated that he was never the same again. They too were married. He was so excited that they were going to have a baby. Yes he was scared, but he was excited. She decided she wasn't ready and went and had an abortion. Of course they are divorced now. He felt violated and rightfully so. It was like saying "I love you, but not enough to have a child with you". It doesn't matter how stupid that may sound to you...that is how he felt. If she didn't want to have children "right then" she should have taken the necessary precautions to prevent it. It shouldn't be something that you are thinking about after the fact. Enferno and his wife weren't two single people just fucking around. They are married. When you get married you have made a vow to that other person. Your lives have joined as one. He has just as much rights to have that baby. She isn't a child and she knew damn well what she was doing each time they had sex. I'm sorry but saying that now just isn't a good time just doesn't fly with me. I am not trying to take sides here, but if I had to I would definitely be on Enferno's side. Sorry to state the obvious, but how the hell does your relationship recover after something like this?

I agree.

Hope this works out for ya', Enferno.

this is your wife, the one woman you chose because you felt trust enough in her to stand by you through thick and thin. that in all situations you both could support one another to move on, find strength, and even overcome and feel joy in this crazy world.

there is no way around the subject of abortion. if she decides to do this she WILL be KILLING the child that is growing inside her womb at this moment, made of your flesh and her own. imagine the pure joy this child will bring you. ask her to ask her own parents what they feel about her. im sure they will say that not a day goes by where they dont feel blessed that she herself was born into their lives.

please be strong. i will pray for you. Our Lord is the Overcomer. The book of Isaiah says that "No weapon formed against me shall prosper". right now your home, and your child is under attack. the enemy is in her head. bro, i reach out to you, and i care. im gonna tell you the Lord loves you, and even if you dont believe that, believe that i love you. a complete stranger. i will pray for you. God bless your family.