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I figured that high school would be the #1 answer by a wide margin. For most of us, that's the last time when we were forced to remain in the company of people we hated or who hated us. In college or, um, adulthood, it's easier to just walk away.
For my stories, there are three that stand out in my mind. In every case, I didn't start the fight, but I did egg them on.
The first was in high school, grade 10 I think. There was a group of 3 or 4 douches that always gave me shit. One time we were waiting at a bus stop and one of them, skinny guy about my build, started up with a bunch of "homo" related jokes (all-boys school, so you have to understand, we took these things seriously), and wouldn't shut up for a good 5 minutes even though I was completely ignoring him, which is what I normally did. I finally snapped back at him with something along the lines of, "Look dude, it's not my fault that you're about to fail your second year in a row because you've got shit for brains and spend all your time smoking pot and trying to jack off your pencil dick."
Well, that seemed to hit a nerve, probably because it was true, but I wasn't expecting a fight, so the bastard got the jump on me - while I still had my stupid sport coat and backpack on. There was a bit of a struggle but it was over pretty quickly with a headlock and several punches. Yep, I got schooled.
The second was also in high school, a year later, with this short, scrappy Chinese kid, and when I say scrappy I mean he was actually reminiscent of Scrappy Doo. Way too big for his britches, he was giving me crap over something completely idiotic (something to do with the colour of my Discman I think, lol), I made a rebuttal concerning the size of his organ and asked how long it takes Chinese kids to reach puberty. I fully expected him to blow up, so I was ready, but the thing was, this happened IN CLASS, and not just any class, but shop, which was this tiny room with several large power tools, and we were right in the middle of a crowd of other students and two feet away from the teacher.
The actual fight was sort of like those cartoon fights where the tall guy (me) has his hand on the short guy's forehead, and the shorty is trying to run forward while blindly punching air. It was a little less one-sided than that, but pretty close, I just kept shoving him back and he couldn't land a punch. They broke it up after about half a minute (or so it seemed) and we both had to do hard time after school for a few days.
The last one was in my 3rd year of university at a Kingston bar, I think Stages. Details are hazy because I was incredibly drunk (I had just turned 19 and was new to this scene), but I had lost track of my sort-of friend, wasn't getting any action, and was alternating between bored and pissed off, and I chose to vent by giving shit to random strangers. One townie told me to get out of his way and pushed me to the side, I pushed back, pushing turned to shoving, shoving turned to fists, and you all know the rest. The bouncers did not break this up (do they even have bouncers inside those bars?), but we were both far too gone to inflict any serious damage. Eventually I tripped him, then turned around to walk away and tripped over my own feet, which gave everyone a good laugh and that was pretty much the end of it as far as I remember.
That was the last time I was in a real fight, about 7 years ago. So I have to agree that learning to avoid fights is part of growing up, but with several of the stories here, I think you could argue that it was justified. Some people have bad luck and run into other people who are looking for a fight and won't take no for an answer, and you've gotta defend yourself. Fortunately it hasn't happened to me.
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My party schedule:
2009-02-21 - DJ Attention @ I'm So Popular
2009-06-18 - DJ Annoying @ People Need To Know Where I'll Be
2012-11-32 - DJ Insufferable ɸ Or At Least the Stalkers I Complain About
2048-06-66 - Spastic & Whocares ¶ Although I'm Actually Flattered
9999-45-81 - Tweaker Gimp ☼ I Probably Won't Even Go To This But I Have To Make Sure I Fill Up All The Available Space Here
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