quote:

Originally posted by Sushipunk My neighbor is one of those. Seriously, she is the fattest person I've ever seen. It's nasty as fuck. She would be 300kg, easily. So many layers of drooping fat

Egg her house and then see if she eats them off the paintwork.

quote:

Originally posted by Domesticated Surely if you get to a certain weight, your arms and midriff get so fat that you're unable to wipe your own anus and have to resort to getting a towel and using it in a kind of back and forth motion sliding between your genitals and your bum with the ends of the towel in your left and right hands?

Too much work. It's easier just to let it all dry and crumble off the next time you stand up.

___________________
There are more things in heaven and earth, Horatio,
Than are dreamt of in your philosophy.

quote:

Originally posted by Halcyon+On+On Too much work. It's easier just to let it all dry and crumble off the next time you stand up.

"Bum rust".

This is probably weird, but I get great satisfaction from using a toothpick to scrape food out of my teeth.

quote:

Originally posted by Halcyon+On+On Too much work. It's easier just to let it all dry and crumble off the next time you stand up.

Not true. It becomes very sticky. Then the ass sweat starts leaking and fuses.

quote:

Originally posted by Domesticated "Bum rust".

Gross.

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quote:

Originally posted by Sunsnail Not true. It becomes very sticky. Then the ass sweat starts leaking and fuses.

Oh. Must be a southern thing.

___________________
There are more things in heaven and earth, Horatio,
Than are dreamt of in your philosophy.

"Dingleberry".

http://www.urbandictionary.com/defi...erm=dingleberry

quote:

Originally posted by Domesticated "Dingleberry". http://www.urbandictionary.com/defi...erm=dingleberry

Lol, I already knew that one.

From personal experience, of course.

___________________

"delinquent"

___________________
There are more things in heaven and earth, Horatio,
Than are dreamt of in your philosophy.

That made me remember why I used to spend hours surfing urban dictionary at work.

quote:

A delinquent partial turd which grasps anal shrubery causing brownish crust to accumulate in ones boxers. My wife tells me that I need to wipe my ass better because my dingleberries are making my underware a nasty mess, however I like the idea of her down in the basement doing laundry and cleaning up my foul nasty underware.

Funny because the guy can't spell and hates his wife.

quote:

n. - a Klingon near Uranus Spock needed to tear off a piece of toilet paper for his next mission - elimination of the dingleberry orbiting the black hole.

quote:

A smallish, semi-dry, extraordinarily tenacious remnant of fecal matter which, when unwittingly rolled into a mixture with toilet paper lint by the action of wiping, becomes almost irremovably entangled among ones anal hair, a situationality exacerbated by the vigorous chafing and friction between the buttocks and most commonly remedied by the sad and almost entirely unavoidable remedy of plucking out at its root the individual hair to which each dingleberry is conjoined. Of related interest, dingleberries are often noted as having the vague odor of undigested corn or peanuts. *Plink* Ouch! Son of a bitch, that hurt! Then, dingleberry is uphelp by a coarse and curly hair between the fingers about 6 inches in front of the face and marveled at by the viewer, who experiences waves of anger, wonder, and bitterness while contemplating in earnest the sordid and very stupid affair of shaving the unfortunate crease in his or her own ass.

Love the academic language that this one uses.