quote:

Originally posted by diego i don't know why you think you need counselling, from what I can see you're thinking about it too much, that's all that's wrong. In answer to your original question, what's the likelihood? I'd say if you keep attending electronic parties and if you make an effort to introduce yourself to girls at these parties the likelihood would be high. But really I think you shouldn't be narrowing what you think you'd like to go out with. At least for a while experiment wih girls who are different to what you ideally outlined what you would like to meet.

Well, probably the reason why this thread has reach 80+ posts is because the complexity of it all is that I won't be in the US for too long (~1 more year) and that if there was some chemistry made between me and some girl, in order for the relationship to progress, she'd have to think about beginning to travel on an international level very often after 2004. Japan isn't the only place I'd like to go in this decade. Many people are afraid of the unknown. Answer the following question: Would you rather date someone who at least knows what direction he/she wants to go in their life or someone who spontaneously makes decisions to just suddenly go to places here and there and never wants to 'stick to one particular area' (example: one day, after living in Japan for a year and building up a pretty solid life there, say 'hmmm, why not leave here for the Netherlands for another year?') (here's another example: 'I'd like to spend my summers in Canada & Europe and my winters in California, Australia, and HK'). Don't get me wrong about it, many people dream of this type of thing but, as many things, it comes at a [very high] price (read: double-edged sword). Wouldn't you agree here?

What one person here said about that a person can match your criteria, but have absolutely no chemistry with you is another true statement as well.

Finally, does anyone on here know if Trance parties are common in Japan? If so, what are some places that throw them very often?

Last edited by ali92 on Jan-16-2004 at 18:15

quote:

Originally posted by ali92 Well, probably the reason why this thread has reach 80+ posts is because the complexity of it all is that I won't be in the US for too long (~1 more year) and that if there was some chemistry made between me and some girl, in order for the relationship to progress, she'd have to think about beginning to travel on on international level very often after 2004. Japan isn't the only place I'd like to go in this decade. Many people are afraid of the unknown. Answer the following question: Would you rather date someone who at least knows what direction he/she wants to go in his life or someone who spontaneously makes decisions to just suddenly go to places here and there and never wants to 'stick to one particular area' (example: one day, after living in Japan for a year and building up a pretty solid life there, say 'hmmm, why not leave here for the Netherlands for another year?') (here's another example: 'I'd like to spend my summers in Canada & Europe and my winters in California, Australia, and HK'). Don't get me wrong about it, many people dream of this type of thing but, as many things, it comes at a [very high] price (read: double-edged sword). Wouldn't you agree here? What one person here said about that a person can match your criteria, but have absolutely no chemistry with you is another true statement as well. Finally, does anyone on here know if Trance parties are common in Japan? If so, what are some places that throw them very often?

Dude, you're still writing out system specs for your future girlfriend. Get over it. That's why people aren't answering you anymore. You're totally refusing to listen to the advice people are giving you.

Just find someone to go out with and go out with her, it's not like one date is a serious commitment anyway.

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quote:

Originally posted by DigiNut [...]Just find someone to go out with and go out with her, it's not like one date is a serious commitment anyway.

How can I train my mind to NOT almost constantly think about where I'll be ~1 - 5 years from now? I know no-one else as concerned about it as me. That's giving off a sign that I think too much and have a very hard time controlling it. If I didn't have this problem, it would be as easy as you say. Think you can give some pointers out on how to deal with the situation? If you was in this situation, what would you do? I definitely see where you are coming from about 'wait and see', etc. (it only makes sense, LOL) but, I can't seem to help but think about the future way too much...

again ali, you're thinking too much.
Who care's if you meet someone and she doesn't want to travel with you, you'll find someone else. With travelling you'll meet more and more new people and the likelihood of finding someone who fits all your criteria, but until then have fun!, (the greater likelihood is you'll meet someone before then who won't fit all your criteria but who you'll really connect with) I'm in a slightly similar situation, I plan to travel the world starting next xmas for a year or 2 or 3, i'll see how it goes. I met this really cool (and hot) girl and she was into trance (and i suppose fit all my crriteria) and stuff and we started going out and when i told her i wanted to travel in a years time she went balistic ('why are you leaving me, yada yada...'). It turned out that the relationship ended bout a month ago, for reasons i'm still unsure of. Anywho what i'm trying to say is a) just cos they fit all the criteria don't mean you'll be able to suffer them for long periods of time (go out with) and b) just because you've plans in the future and they don't fit in with them or you don't fit into theirs, ignore it, just have fun together now while you can and c) stop thinking so much.

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diego, the white edition page

quote:

Originally posted by ali92 How can I train my mind to NOT almost constantly think about where I'll be ~1 - 5 years from now? I know no-one else as concerned about it as me. That's giving off a sign that I think too much and have a very hard time controlling it. If I didn't have this problem, it would be as easy as you say. Think you can give some pointers out on how to deal with the situation? If you was in this situation, what would you do? I definitely see where you are coming from about 'wait and see', etc. (it only makes sense, LOL) but, I can't seem to help but think about the future way too much...

I can see that you've goals in the future and i'm the same i don't want to be stuck in the same place for long periods of time, i'll get bored and stuff. But if i thought about like you think about it(correct me if i'm wrong), ie. oh why persue any relationship now cos it has no future, then why pursue any relationship at all, as i've already outlined above, none of them can be guaranteed to last no matter how compatible you are. So just have fun while they do last and don't worry about the future, just presume it be good.

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diego, the white edition page

quote:

Originally posted by ali92 1-3. I'll try all you said there... 4. Your example about the time won't work, as I always have the time on my Casio yyyy-MM-dd 24 h G-SHOCK watch.

hahahahah I just read that.

You really are a robot.



aaaaahahahahahahaa.

I dont think its fair to say that jsut becasue someone dislikes your taste in certain things dosent mean that they should be shrugged off. Im not being full of my self right here but i hang out with the most popular girls in my school, my older brotehr who just graduated hugn out with them adn im 4 years younger, and i play chess competitavely, listen to almost only trance, read incessiantly but still hang out with these 'normal' people on the weekend. Infact tonight i plan on getting a 12 pack of natural light and hanging out with these people. My best friend infact hates my music style, he listens to ben harper, widespread panic, and o.a.r So what im tring to say is this, just because they dont like certain parts of a person dosent mean you should dislike this person. for instance:

Person: Whats up sam
Me: not much you
Person: not a whole lot, what in gods name are you listening to
Me:Trance
Person:Trance?
Me: Techno
Girl:Whatever thats cool



so all in all you dont have to agree with them and they dont ave to agree with you.

my 2 cents

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